


Zombie Movie Rules

by DaydreamDestiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Croatoan/Endverse, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blasphemy, Come Sharing, Endverse!Cas, Graphic Violence, Grinding, Human!Castiel - Freeform, John's mediocre parenting, M/M, Making Out, Mary winchester is alive, Masturbation, Minor (canon) Character Deaths, Sam wasn't infected with demon blood also for reasons, Sort of Toppy Castiel, Unsafe Sex, definitely needy Dean, handjobs, human!Gabriel, sort of, sort of sub Dean, the Winchester hunt together on the weekends because reasons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-30 21:01:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 31,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8548987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaydreamDestiel/pseuds/DaydreamDestiel
Summary: Just like any other Friday night, Dean, Castiel, Jo, Benny and Michael were in their floor's common room just hanging out when the first reports of rash violence breaking out in California came on the news. Dean tried not to panic because Sam was at Stanford, but when his brother called to say he was in trouble, Dean and his friends dropped everything to drive half-way across the country to save him. The last thing Dean thought he’d find on this weird roadtrip meets rescue mission was that his feelings for Castiel might not be quite as unrequited as he thought.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This was my first time participating in the DCBB and it was so much fun. My fantastic artist was [Kuwlshadow](http://kuwlshadow.livejournal.com/) and I'm totally blown away by the fantastic art I received. <3 I loved writing this fic, I loved the challenge, and I will definitely be back next year. 
> 
> I really hope you enjoy, and as always I'd love to hear from you in the comments or over on Tumblr [@daydreamdestiel](http://daydreamdestiel.tumblr.com). 
> 
> I'm also thinking about writing a sequel, maybe about the development of Sam & Gabe's relationship or following up with Dean, Cas & Benny on a case. Ooo, or maybe Christmas or something with all of them. I dunno, but if you wanna see more of these guys, lemme know what you'd like. :D 
> 
> Big thanks to [@Brenna_Fae ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Brenna_Fae/pseuds/Brenna_Fae)and [@atomicdetectivehideout](http://archiveofourown.org/users/atomicdetectivehideout/pseuds/atomicdetectivehideout) who were my first readers, who encouraged me when I needed it and who kept me motivated. Thanks!!

<a href="https://imgur.com/Dyi4ekd"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/Dyi4ekd.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" width="100%" height="100%"/></a>

 

7:30pm Friday, Kansas

“Listen, Cas, I know you  _ think  _ you like the new Star Trek movies, but  _ come on _ . Events in the new timeline don’t even make sense. And neither does warp travel. Nero leaves Vulcan at high warp, which for a ship from the late 24th century is Warp 9, but the Enterprise in the new timeline is only capable of Warp 7. So Nero’s ship is way faster,  _ and  _ he had a twenty-minute head start.  _ No way  _ the Enterprise would make it there before they blew up Earth. Plus, man, a ship full of kids who haven’t even graduated yet is like making Doogie Howser but he wasn’t a doctor or a child genius!” Dean argued passionately.

Castiel, for his part, managed not to roll his eyes at every point Dean made, even though he really wanted to. Not for the first time he wondered how he’d been roped into this argument.

Dean was sitting next to him on the couch in the common room, Benny was sprawled on one of the big comfy chairs nearby. Michael sat on the other one, a bored Jo in his lap.

“Okay,  _ so  _ there are plot holes. But they’re also creating a new story and a new beginning to attract new fans. They didn’t wanna bog down the cinematic experience with tech speak.  _ And  _ the new cast is hotter.” Castiel added the last part as if it was the most definitive counter-argument and Dean looked scandalized.

Castiel tried really hard to hold back the smirk that threatened to flash across his face at Dean’s disgust. Teasing Dean was probably the best part about these little debates; Dean’s cheeks would flush dark red the more worked up he got, his green eyes bright and his brows drawn down in concentration.

_ He looks downright fuckable, not that Dean doesn’t always look fuckable.  _ Four years into being friends, living on the same floor in Oliver Hall at KU and Castiel still wasn’t over his feelings for Dean. Figured he probably never would be.

There was just too much to love about Dean; his honesty, kindness, the way he put everyone else first. He was funny and smart too. Castiel could wax poetic about all the things Dean made him feel. At least, he could to himself.

Sometimes he wondered if Dean felt the same, but Castiel never managed to get up the courage to just  _ ask him. _ Instead he settled for being his best friend, and really, that wasn't so bad. He got to be close to him, knew him better than most people did and sometimes there were little stolen looks and innocent touches that just served to make his little crush that much stronger.

Besides, Castiel and relationships never went well together. He never managed to keep anyone around for longer than a few weeks. Dean was pretty similar in that respect, so there was always the risk that they'd give it a shot and fuck everything up, and Castiel wasn't ready for the aftermath of that at all.

“ _ As if  _ that makes up for the rest!” Dean denied, shaking his head, frustrated.

The smirk that twitched at the corners of Castiel’s lips was the first sign Dean saw that Castiel wasn't taking this seriously whatsoever.  _ He’s tryin’ to piss me off on purpose, that dick. _

“You jerk.” Dean grumbled, and Castiel’s smirk finally broke free and spread across his face.

_ Fuck he’s gorgeous when he smiles like that, _ Dean thought.

“I’m sorry, but if you want me to seriously debate this, I’m gonna need a lot more alcohol.” Castiel informed him as his smirk blossomed into a grin that made Dean’s heart stutter.

“Whaddya mean more?” Dean asked, one eyebrow raised. “We haven’t had any drinks yet.”

“Correction:  _ You  _ haven’t had any drinks.” Benny interrupted with a lopsided smile. “Cas and I grabbed a couple at the bar with supper.”

Dean felt a little stab of jealousy at Benny and Castiel spending time together alone despite the fact he knew Benny wasn’t interested in Castiel like that. Benny had been Dean’s roommate for the past four school years, and Dean knew for a fact that he was over heels for some girl named Andrea. Had been for the last six months at least, probably longer since he tended to keep his feelings under wraps.

And anyway, Dean had no right to feel jealous, he and Castiel were just friends. It’s not like he had any sort of claim over the guy’s free time,  _ and  _ he’d been busy anyway, so why the hell was there a flash of irritation nagging at him?

“Well, that’s just unfair.” Jo complained as she smiled at Dean. “Looks like we have to catch up Winchester.”

“Yeah, while we were busy, I dunno, actually  _ going  _ to class, these losers were out drinking. That’s just downright mean.” Dean lamented with an exaggerated pout, though his tone was more amused than depressed.

“Aww. Did we hurt your feelings, Dean?” Castiel teased, highly doubtful that Dean was anything other than jealous they hadn’t been studying too.

“Of course you hurt his feelings,  _ Castiel _ .” Jo said and then her sarcastic smile took a devious turn. “Maybe you should kiss them better?”

Dean’s eyes widened, and his cheeks heated in a blush that made everyone break out in loud laughter. A little irritated at being the butt of the joke, Dean crossed his arms over his chest.

“Calm down Dean, I’m not gonna molest you just because Jo tells me to.” Castiel informed him, still chuckling.

“I can safely say from personal experience: You should always do what Jo says.” Michael piped up with a grin.

“Pfft.” Castiel disagreed with a wave of his hand. “Unlike you,  _ I  _ don’t have to worry about Jo withholding sex.”

“No.” Jo agreed. “But you do have to worry about who might shave off your eyebrows while you’re sleeping.”

Dean smothered a laugh behind his hand at Castiel’s indignant expression.

“You wouldn’t!” Castiel exclaimed.

“Oh, I dunno, I think you’d sleep right through it. Michael would for sure let me in.” Jo said with a wink as Michael nodded.

“Well that’s just a gross breach of my trust as your roommate, Michael.” Castiel informed him, though he wasn’t really intimidated.

“Sorry, Cas, hos before bros.” Michael said as a wide smile spread his lips.

Castiel rolled his eyes, and turned to Dean with a can-you-believe-this look on his face. Dean nodded in agreement; Michael was as whipped as they came. Dean would’ve agreed to that even if it wasn’t  _ Castiel  _ who pointed it out. He definitely wasn’t at all biased.

“Dude. It’s supposed to be bros before hos.” Dean complained.

“Did you just call me a ho, Dean Winchester?” Jo demanded with faux anger.

Everyone cracked up and Dean shrugged.  

“Hey, in my defense, Michael did it first.” Dean justified.

“There are lots of things Michael does that you aren’t allowed to.” Jo teased with a sly grin.

“Joanna Beth Harvelle! There are things I  _ really  _ don’t need to know about you.” Dean basically whined as his cheeks turned that lovely shade of pink everyone always seemed to find so amusing.

A round of laughter rang out and Jo chuckled insidiously at his discomfort.

Sometimes Dean found it hard to believe that it’d been four years already, that this was their last year before graduation. It felt like just yesterday they’d all shown up fresh faced for move-in day that first year.

The only one he’d known there had been Jo, and he’d clung to her side. Lucky for both of them, Jo had been much less shy and she’d met Michael, who’d introduced them in turn to Cas. Later that day Benny had arrived and he and Dean had hit it off right away, the rest was history. And Dean was incredibly glad for whatever twist of fate had shoved them all together, because friends like his? You couldn’t find better if you tried.

“Hey guys!” Anna called out from over where she’d been sitting in front of the TV, pulling Dean from his reminiscing. He hadn’t even noticed her there. “Check this out. Dean isn’t your brother in California?”

“Yeah, Sam’s at Stanford. Why, what’s up?” Dean asked, as dread pooled in his stomach.

The look on Anna’s face said nothing good, but she just cranked up the volume on the TV instead of answering.

“ _ A wave of bizarre attacks has been gripping Northern California today, and seems to be spreading south. We still have no solid information on who’s behind these attacks or what’s causing these people, who have been described as totally normal, well-adjusted individuals, to start attacking their families and neighbors. All we can say for certain is something major is going on here, and we’ll be monitoring the situation closely and updating you as information becomes available. Authorities are suggesting citizens stay inside, and stay safe.” _

Dean’s eyebrows climbed his forehead. What the hell was happening in California? He reached for his phone and tapped on Sam’s number before his mind had even fully processed what the news anchor had said.

The phone rang as Dean’s heart pounded and he reminded himself to breathe, keep calm while he waited for Sam to pick up. He’d known it was a bad idea for his little brother to go to school so damn far away. That Sam was eighteen didn't make it any easier for Dean to stop thinking of him as little.

A reassuring hand squeezed Dean’s shoulder and he looked over to see Castiel just as Sam picked up. Dean was grateful for the contact, melted into it a little before Castiel released his grip.

“ _ Dean?  _ ” Sam whispered.

“Yeah, Sam. What’s going on? Why are you whispering?” Dean demanded before he took a deep breath to slow his spiraling thoughts.

He’d be no damn good to Sam if he was panicking. He needed to keep his head clear and focused on solving whatever problem Sam was facing.

“ _ There’s something weird going on here Dean. I was visiting my friend Brady’s family in Angel’s Camp-” _

“Angel’s Camp?” Dean cut in, not really sure where the heck that was.

“ _ Yeah, it’s a little town, couple hours away from Stanford. His family lives… lived there.”  _ Sam explained.

Wind rushed in the phone, and the sound of branches or gravel or something crunched underfoot as Sam walked.

“Alright, so what’s, uh, what’s going on, Sammy? Something we’ve seen before?”

“ _ No. Nothing  _ I’ve  _ ever seen, anyway. I dunno Dean, we were having dinner with Brady’s parents when one of his neighbors knocked on the door. Said he needed to talk to Brady’s dad, and when his mom let the guy in; he just went nuts, started attacking everyone. Brady tried to stop him and the guy stabbed him! He kept saying not to worry, it wouldn’t hurt. His mom and Dad were next, but the guy didn’t  _ kill  _ them, he just knocked ‘em out. I got to my backpack, you know, with my stuff in it, and by the time I got back downstairs he was dripping  _ his blood  _ in their wounds. I didn’t know what the hell to do, so I called 911 and I took off. I think maybe he’s following me. I’m scared Dean.” _

Sam’s voice shook a bit as he recounted the story and Dean’s heart ached for him. He wished he could be there to protect his little brother like he was supposed to.

“It’s okay, Sammy. You gotta calm down. First thing we need to do is get you someplace safe. Somewhere you can hide out ‘til I get there-”

“My brother Gabriel has a cottage near Angel’s Camp. It’s like 15 minutes by car.” Castiel interrupted, concern in his eyes. “I can call Gabriel?”

“Listen, Sammy, Cas’s brother has a cottage about 15 minutes away by car. You got access to one?”

“ _ No. I’m in the woods on foot.” _

“Alright, might be a bit of a hike, but it’s still your best shot. I’m gonna get the GPS coordinates and text them to you alright? You can do this Sammy, listen to me; you got this.”   

Dean could picture Sam nodding uncertainly, those big hazel eyes begging him to help, and every protective bone in his body screamed that he needed to get there  _ now. _

_ “Okay. I’m okay.” _

“I know, Sammy. I’ll be there as soon as I can. Trust me. You’re gonna be fine. I’ll call you as soon as I’m leaving okay? I just gotta gear up and call Mom and Dad, then I’m on my way.”

“ _ Alright. Tell them I love them. And I love you too.  _ ”

“Shut up, bitch, you’re gonna be fine.”

“ _ Just say it jerk!” _

“Fine! Whatever. Love you too.”

Dean sighed and hung up the phone. He turned to look at his friends; they all watched him with a mixture of worry and warmth that made his stomach sink.

“Cas, what’s the address to your brother’s place? I gotta text Sam the GPS coordinates.” Dean said, snapping everyone out of the silence that seemed to have descended.

Castiel quickly gave Dean the address and Dean googled the coordinates, then texted them to Sam. There was a lot to do and Dean had very little time to do it, he’d need to pack everything he might need, and he needed to let his parents know where he was going.

“Hey Cas, maybe you should call your brother? Let him know Sam’s coming? I gotta go call my parents.” Dean said.

“Yeah, Gabe’ll be fine with it though. I’ll just give him a head’s up.” Castiel replied.

Dean nodded, walked out of the common room, and headed down the hall to his and Benny’s room.    


Save

Save


	2. Chapter 2

8:00pm Friday, Kansas

The call to his parents hadn’t taken long. John had answered the phone, and Dean had gotten right down to business. Almost without pause, John had barked orders, told Dean to gear up and head out, but not to cross into California until he and Mary caught up. Wait at Coaldale, a little ghost town in Nevada near the California border.

Dean had never heard of it, but John insisted that Dean needed to wait there and despite the fact that all of his big brother instincts were screaming at him to go in, guns blazing, Dean knew that if he went in solo it would be an epically bad idea. Especially since he didn’t know exactly what he’d be facing.

Once he’d stuffed a bag with a couple changes of clothes and all the snacks he’d hidden in the bottom drawer of the dresser under his loft bed, Dean was ready to head out. He only felt a slight twinge of worry about having to miss his classes for however long he’d be gone.  _ Whatever, I’ll figure it out when I get back. _

Dean pulled his army green duffle bag onto his shoulder and took one last quick look around in an attempt to shake the feeling that he was forgetting something. When nothing immediately stood out, he shrugged a shoulder and went back to the common room to say goodbye to everyone.

\---

The quiet discussion stopped the second Dean walked through the common room door, and a lump formed in Dean’s throat as he looked at the concern on his friends’ faces.

Dean opened his mouth, but he wasn’t sure what to say. He knew none of them were going to like that he was headed into danger, but it couldn’t be helped. Sammy was his priority. He just didn’t know how to tell  _ them  _ that.

Jo, of course, knew, she’d grown up with him and she’d seen what their life had been like, the rest of them? Not so much, and honestly, he’d never really thought about how much of himself he’d had to keep secret from the people who were his closest friends in the world, and it suddenly felt like way too much to explain.

“I, uh, I have to go get Sam, so um, I guess I’ll be gone a while.” Dean informed them, his words came out almost choked as he tried not to look at any of them for too long, particularly Castiel.

Each time Dean’s eyes accidentally caught on Castiel’s his heart squeezed painfully, and Dean had never been more acutely aware of the intensity in Castiel’s gaze.

“Dean, you big dumb jerk, we’re obviously coming too.” Jo announced in a voice that brokered no room for argument.

“No, Jo, you’re not. First of all, your mom would gut me for bringing you in on this. Second of all, you might know what’s up, but the rest of them don’t have a sweet clue. Hell,  _ I  _ barely have a goddamn clue. No way am I bringing a bunch of civvies into a situation like this.” Dean replied as calmly as he could even though his heart was pounding in his chest at the thought of any of them tagging along.

It was a strange mix of hope, need and fear and he didn’t know which one would win out. All of the things he’d said were absolutely true, but it didn’t stop him from wanting the comfort that would come from making this road trip meets rescue mission with friends instead of alone.

Castiel’s head tilted slightly as he tried to make sense of Dean addressing them as ‘civvies’. As far as he knew Dean had never spent any time in the military, and neither had Jo. It seemed weird for him to use that term, but he decided to let it go in favor of convincing Dean to bring them along.

“Obviously none of us understand what’s going on, Dean, but my brother’s there too.” Castiel reminded him gently, determined blue eyes locked on Dean’s. “And I’m going.”

“No.”

“Yes.”  

“ _ No, Cas.  _ ”

“ _ Yes, Dean _ .”

“Fuck  _ me _ .” Dean exclaimed, irritated. “Listen, you got no idea what’s out there. It’s  _ dangerous _ , Cas. I’ve seen a lot of scary shit, shit you wouldn’t fuckin’ believe. And  _ this _ ? It’s bigger than all of that. So, please don’t ask me to bring you guys with me. I promise I’ll bring Gabriel back too. Can’t that be good enough?”

“Would it be good enough if I said the same about Sam?”

And shit, Castiel had him by the short and curlies there, because fuck no, it wouldn’t. Dean knew it, Castiel knew it, hell, everyone there knew it. But what was he supposed to do? He didn’t have time for the whole goddamn ‘the truth is out there speech’ right now.

“Dean,” Jo said, voice deceptively sweet. “I know you think you can do this alone, but Sam’s basically my little brother too, and I  _ need  _ to help. If something happened to you and Sam and I could’ve saved you… I’d feel like shit for the rest of my life.  _ Don’t make my life shit, Dean.  _ ”

“At least you’d be alive to live it, Jo.” Dean argued, still just barely holding on to the thread of logic that was giving him all the reasons this was a bad idea. “’Cause you gotta understand, if you go with me, that’s what you’re risking. I’ll be the first to admit, I think Sam’s life is worth a hell of a lot more than mine, but I can’t ask any of you to lay down your lives for him. It wouldn’t be fair.”

When his statement was met with silence, Dean let out a premature sigh of relief, thought for one brief shining moment he’d talked them out of it, until Castiel stepped forward, a hard look in his eyes.

“I know I’m repeating myself here, but Gabe’s there too.” Castiel said with deceptive calm; he was pissed the fuck off that Dean thought so little of himself. To Castiel, Dean’s life was worth every bit as much as Sam’s. He understood the need to protect family, he certainly felt the need to go after Gabe, but he hated that Dean was so cavalier about his own value. “He might be an annoying asshole of a big brother, but he’s  _ my  _ annoying asshole of a big brother and I’m gonna go get his big dumb ass and bring him home. If you won’t take me with you, I’ll take my  _ own  _ car.”

“Cas, your car barely even  _ works _ . No way it’s gonna make it halfway across the country.” Dean started, but cut off at the glare Castiel gave him in response. “Fine.  _ You  _ can come.”

“Dean, if you think for one damn second you’re leaving me here, then you clearly don’t know me as well as you should.” Jo told him icily, hands on her hips and frustration painted on her face.

“Jo…”

“Dean, I’m going. End of discussion. Not your choice.” Jo squared her shoulders stubbornly, and Dean knew he was sunk.

“Alright. Fine.” He snapped.

“If Jo goes, I’m going.” Michael said, and Dean instantly liked him just a bit more for sticking with Jo. “Don’t give me that look Joanna Beth. I  _ know  _ you can take care of yourself, but I’m  _ not  _ just gonna stay here while you head off into a dangerous situation.”

“I don’t know if I wanna kiss you because that was kind of sweet or punch you because it’s bordering on patronizing.” Jo said as she looked torn.

“If it helps, I’d prefer a kiss.” Michael said smoothly.

“If it helps, I’d rather you punch him.” Dean added unhelpfully.

“Shut up, Dean!” They both exclaimed, still looking at one another lovingly.

Dean rolled his eyes, Michael and Jo were always disgustingly cute like that. Still, he couldn’t help the rush of warmth that suffused his chest when he realized he wasn’t going to be alone on this.

There was still that nagging voice in the back of his mind that told him it would be a bad idea to let any of them come, but he shoved it down for now. They’d clearly made their decisions and he sure as shit wasn’t gonna let them follow along in Castiel’s crappy car.

They’d be better off with him than they would be on their own, and he knew for a fact that both Castiel and Jo were stubborn enough to actually take Castiel’s car and try to follow him.

Still…

“Benny,” Dean tried, maybe he could at least keep one of them here, safe.

“Save your breath.” Benny cut him off gruffly. “We’ve been friends just as long as we’ve been roommates. You've always been there for me, and I don't forget shit like that. So I'll be taggin' along too if ya don't mind.”

Dean let out another defeated sigh. Looked like it was gonna be a full car.

“ _ Fine.  _ ” He repeated, frustrated, anxious and relieved all at the same time. “If we’re gonna do this we need to gear up and go. That means you have ten minutes to pack some clothes, grab some supplies and then we’re rolling out.”

“Dean!” Anna called out from where she was still stationed over by the TV. “You need to see this! They have some new info.”

Dean ran a weary hand through his hair as he made his way over to check out the latest news.

“ _ …officials are calling the phenomena ‘Croatoan virus’. The disease seems to be blood-borne, but that’s about all we’ve been able to pry out of our sources. Officials are keeping tight-lipped on the origin of the virus as well as what exactly the symptoms are. All we know is we’re seeing massive spikes in violence throughout the state of California. It doesn’t seem to have spread beyond the borders yet and there’s no indication as to why that is. As always, we’re doing everything we can to bring you the most up-to-date facts.” _

Dean turned to look at his friends, all of their eyes were glued to the screen, and he found a part of himself hoping that the grim broadcast had changed their minds where he couldn’t.

“If anyone wants to back out, now would be a good time.” He announced.

When four stony faces met his declaration, Dean shrugged his shoulder.

“Alright then, go get your shit together and meet me down at my car.”

\--

After his friends had rushed off to their rooms to throw their bags together, Dean made his way down to his car. Set his bag on the ground beside him and unlocked, then popped the trunk. He looked around quickly, just to make sure he was alone before he opened the hidden compartment to take stock of the weapons it held.

It wasn’t as well stocked as it would’ve been if he’d been hunting more regularly. A lot of his guns and other weapons were safely stashed at home with his Mom and Dad.

But, he had a couple of handguns, a sawed-off double-barrel shotgun, a rifle, a bowie knife, a machete, a jug of holy water, a cross, a big bag of salt, a few flashlights, some rope, a bunch of ammo for his guns along with various other odds and ends he’d picked up over the years. It could’ve been worse. Definitely could’ve been better though.

Dean reached in and pulled out his favorite of the handguns; A Colt 1911 that his Dad had given him for his sixteenth birthday. The ornate engraving and the ivory side grips made her a little pretty for his taste, but she’d been his first, and that made her special.

“I almost don’t wanna ask, because,  _ woah _ , but where did you get all of that?” Castiel asked and Dean jumped about a foot, startled, at the sound of his voice.

“Jesus, Cas! Don’t sneak up on a guy holding a damn gun!” Dean exclaimed as his heart pounded and he placed the Colt back into the trunk then closed the false bottom.

“Sorry. It’s not like I was expecting you to be holding a gun though.” Castiel argued reasonably.

“ _ Obviously _ , but you clearly saw it before you scared the shit out of me.” Dean complained.

“And  _ you  _ still didn’t answer my question.” Castiel pointed out as he tossed his bag into the trunk.

“Kind of a long story, Cas.” Dean answered before he scrubbed a tired hand over his face. “You, uh, you wouldn’t believe it anyway.”

“Try me.” Castiel said as he cocked his head to the side like he was studying Dean.

Dean tilted his head down to look into Castiel’s eyes, and rubbed the back of his neck as he stalled.

“You’re just gonna think I’m crazy, man.” Dean said, and then it hit him; if Castiel thought he was crazy, maybe he’d stay behind, safe, after all? Dean’s eyes lit up a little as he considered how he was going to word this for maximum impact. “But okay, I’ll give you a rundown on my dark and shady past if that’s what you really want…”

“Well, now you’re just trying to weird me out.” Castiel stated before he shrugged a shoulder. “But sure, tell me your super scary backstory.”

Castiel leaned back against the car, and Dean followed suit. He looked over at Castiel and took a deep breath.

“Fine. First thing you gotta know is: Monsters and ghosts and all that shit?  _ Real _ . Basically most of the supernatural bad shit you hear about?  _ Real _ . Except bigfoot. We got no proof of that." Dean smirked.  "Anyway, long story short my mom’s family’s been hunting shit like that for generations. Me and Sam were the first in her family  _ not  _ to be trained as hunters from a young age. Mom wanted us to be normal, you know? Have an apple pie life or somethin’. Kinda fell apart when a bunch of vamps came blazing through town when I was eleven. Mom probably would’ve taken ‘em down herself, but they showed up at the house before she could go hunt them. The noise woke Sam, Dad and me, and it was  _ scary,  _ sure, but she was  _ amazing _ ! She managed to get all of ‘em but one, the fucker got away, and once a vamp knows your scent, you’re screwed. They can track you. Mom had to tell us what was going on, she had no other choice by then, so she trained Dad, and they trained us, and we caught the fucker, cleaned out the new nest he’d been making to come after us. Now we hunt on the weekends. Or we did. Before Sam went to Stanford. He never really liked the whole hunting thing. But yeah, monsters: real.  _ So _ , still wanna get in a car and drive across the country with me, Cas?”

There was a long pause when Dean finished speaking where Castiel just stared at him with those piercing blue eyes, shadowed in the darkness of the late fall night. Dean couldn’t read his expression, but he felt a flash of self-consciousness nonetheless.

He’d basically just bared his soul to Castiel. No one other than his family and a few close family friends knew that part of Dean, and even if there was no way Castiel would believe him, it was still the most honest moment he’d had with anyone in a long time.

The thing that really surprised Dean, was how much he actually wished Castiel  _ would  _ believe him. He wanted Castiel to see him,  _ really  _ see him and that was practically unfathomable to Dean. He’d lived with this secret part of himself and his life for so long now, that he almost never felt the need to share it, and there he was, spilling it all to Castiel.

“Yes. I still wanna get in the car, Dean.” Castiel replied as he smirked at Dean just a little.

“I’m not sure if that means you believe me or if you think my brand of crazy’s not dangerous. Either way, it kinda calls your decision making process into question here, Cas.” Dean joked with a half-smile.

“Honestly, I haven’t decided if I believe you or not. It feels like believing that would make me really gullible but either way, it doesn’t factor into my decision all that much.” Castiel answered with a shrug.

And it was the truth. He didn’t care if Dean was being honest or just trying to scare him off. Either way, it came down to just one thing. One fundamentally important thing.

“No?”

“Nope. I trust you.”

“You  _ trust  _ me?”

“Yeah, Dean. I trust you to get our brothers back safe and also not to kill and skin me on the way there or back.”

“Why the hell would I skin you?”

“Well, I mean,  _ hopefully  _ you wouldn’t.”

“I’m not gonna skin you, Cas!”

Castiel was grinning by the time Dean finished his sentence, and they both stared at each other for a tense moment before they dissolved into laughter.

Castiel’s eyes sparkled and Dean’s heart skipped a beat because  _ God,  _ Castiel had an amazing laugh. It was perfect and infectious; just what he needed to shatter the tension that constricted his chest.

“What was that about you skinning Cas, Dean?” Jo asked as she tossed her bag into the trunk.

“Who’s skinning Cas?” Benny asked as he walked up to the car.

“No one!” Dean said, frustrated. “No one’s skinning, Cas.  _ Jesus _ . Why is everyone obsessed with  _ skinning _ ?”

“Wow, calm down, Dean.” Michael insisted. “We all know you love Cas too much to murder and skin him.”

“I’m so glad this is my life.” Dean grumbled sarcastically with a half-hearted glare directed at Michael.


	3. Chapter 3

8:30pm, Kansas

They hadn’t been driving for more than ten minutes when the first broadcast update came on the radio. Castiel’s eyes flashed to Dean’s as he cranked the dial to turn it up. Dean bit his lip as he listened, glad Castiel was up front beside him, silently supportive.

Castiel wanted to reach a hand out to touch Dean’s shoulder, reassure him a physical manner, but he held himself back, if he touched Dean right then he might not be able to stop himself from touching; he imagined his hand trailing down Dean’s arm to hold his hand comfortingly, but ultimately it would be more for his own benefit than for Dean’s. They were in a high-stakes situation, the last thing Dean needed was one more variable to worry about.

“ _ The exact nature of the virus remains unknown. One source from the CDC has informed us they’ve found that lymphocyte percentages are high in the infected patients. This is an indication that their bodies are fighting off a virus of some kind. We’ve also been told there’s some sort of weird residue in the blood. Our source said it appears to be sulphur but couldn’t offer any conclusions about how that could lead to the violent behavior we’re seeing here. More information to come as it becomes available.” _

Dean sucked in a breath at the mention of sulphur and his eyes locked on Jo’s in the rearview mirror. Jo’s whole body tensed up and she reached for Michael’s hand.

“Okay guys, what’s with the sudden tension in the car?” Castiel asked as he glanced between Jo and Dean.

Dean shrugged as his eyes flicked back to the road. He’d given Castiel his little spiel, but Michael and Benny were still in the dark as far as the supernatural went, and he wasn’t really sure how to answer Castiel’s question without sounding ten kinds of crazy.

“Sulphur’s linked to demonic activity.” Benny supplied from the backseat.

Shocked, Dean’s mouth dropped open a little, and Jo’s head whipped to the side so fast Dean was almost sure he heard a crack.

“Uhhh, how did you know that, Benny?” Jo asked, eyes wide.

“What’s wrong, Cher, you two think you’re the only ones who know what’s out there in the dark?” Benny grumbled.

“I mean, kinda. Yeah.” Jo offered with an easy grin.

“Well, clearly you were mistaken.” Benny joked, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, but he didn’t offer any further explanation.

Dean glanced in the rearview at Michael’s unperturbed face.  _ Is anyone in this goddamn car normal? _

“How come  _ he’s _ not all freaked out?” Dean asked as he flapped a hand back at Michael.

“Dean, we’ve been together for over a year.” Jo answered with a roll of her eyes. “ _ Of course  _ I told him about hunting. We even did a salt and burn together last month. Great bonding experience.”

“Well thanks for giving me a heads up  _ Joanna Beth _ !” Dean exclaimed as he turned his attention back to driving.

“ _ Excuse me for not knowing it was important to you!  _ ” Jo replied defensively.

Unsure why it really bothered him, Dean frowned at the road ahead. Maybe he just felt off-kilter with the sudden revelation that he’d been carefully guarding secrets about himself when he hadn’t needed to after all.

“Now I feel like the odd one out.” Castiel complained. “Am I  _ seriously  _ the only one who didn’t know about all this shit?”

The silence in the car was his confirmation and he glared at each of them in turn.

“ _ Really  _ ? All of you? And no one thought, hey, you know, maybe we should fill Cas in so he doesn’t,  _ I don’t know _ , get eaten by a  _ monster  _ that he doesn’t even know to believe in?  _ No? _ None of you thought that.  _ Wow, guys _ .” Castiel seethed. “I feel  _ so  _ loved right now.”

“To be fair,” Dean said. “I didn’t know the other guys knew. So it’s not like I was specifically keeping it from you.”

Castiel glared disbelievingly at Dean. Really? That was how he was going to defend himself?

“To be fair,  _ Dean _ , I don’t think a hungry fucking monster would  _ care  _ if you were  _ specifically  _ excluding me or not.” Castiel countered, arms crossed over his chest.

“You’re right, Cas.” Jo soothed. “We’re sorry. We should have told you sooner.”

Castiel sighed loudly before he realized how petty and ridiculous he was being and the hostility drained from his body. No one had meant for him to be the only one not in the know. Still, it was kind of frustrating that he was the only one struggling with believing, because  _ apparently  _ he was the only one who hadn’t been indoctrinated into this weird paranormal rabbit hole they were headed down.

“It’s okay. I probably would’ve thought you were crazy anyway. I’m  _ still  _ not a hundred percent sure you’re  _ not  _ all crazy.” Castiel relented.

“See, and  _ that’s  _ why I didn’t tell anyone.” Dean answered smugly and Castiel shot him a dirty look in reply.

“Shut up, Dean!” Jo groaned as she smacked him in the back of the head.

“Hey! I’m trying to drive here, Jo!” Dean nearly whined.

Castiel suddenly turned in his seat to look back at Benny, eyes narrowed.

“Wait! Benny, did you say  _ demonic activity?  _ As in  _ demons _ ? As in  _ hell?  _ ” Castiel questioned rapid fire.

“Sure did.” Benny confirmed, and Castiel’s eyes flashed over to Dean.

“He’s serious? Hell’s real? Like  _ really  _ real?” Castiel asked gravely.

“Uh, yeah man. Unfortunately.” Dean said.

“Well shit.” Castiel objected as he scrubbed a hand through his hair, messing it up. “As an atheist, I object. I mean, who even decides who goes to hell? Is there a God too? This is throwing a giant monkey wrench in my enjoy-the-shit-out-of-life because you only get one philosophy. I wonder if that orgy I was in that one time is something hell-worthy. I mean, it’s not like I participated all that much, but I was in the same room. And I was high. Holy shit! Do you think getting high is a sin? I’m  _ fucked.  _ ”

“Take a breath, Cas.” Jo cut in. “I'm pretty sure you have to do some seriously bad shit to go to hell. That or sell your soul. God's a maybe I guess. It's still sort of a philosophical question. It's not like anyone we know has actually met  _ God.  _ I mean, unless  _ you  _ know, Benny?”

“Nope.” Benny replied simply.  

“See, nothing to worry ab- wait a minute,  _ when were you in an orgy  _ ?” Jo demanded disbelievingly.

“First year.” Castiel answered with a shrug. “Remember that party you guys wouldn’t come to? Something about studying and final exams, and responsibility.”

“Well that’s just- You never said it was- This is so unfair.” Dean complained. “You went to an orgy and you didn’t even participate? Who does that?”

“It’s not like I knew going in that it was gonna be an orgy, Dean! They didn’t hand out flyers with like ‘Hey! Everyone wash up before the orgy’.” Castiel smirked, eyes crinkling with amusement. “Besides, even if I did know, there’s no way you would’ve gone. Do you even remember first-year you?”

“Oh my god! He was so sweet and naïve. All starry eyed and adorable.” Jo teased.

“Yeah, and then I spent the next three and a half years with you guys and look at me now.” Dean grumbled.

“Mmhmm. Much more rugged and worn out.” Michael piped up with a half smile.

“Plus you lost your virginity.” Jo added as she nodded.

“Shut up! I wasn’t a virgin.” Dean protested vehemently.

“I mean, you were a type of virgin.” Castiel disagreed with a huge grin.

“You guys are the actual worst.  _ The worst _ .” Dean said.

“Remember that time-” Benny began but was cut off by the shrill ring of Dean’s phone.

“Dude! Get an actual ringtone, you dinosaur!” Jo complained as Dean worked his phone out of his jeans.

“But how else would I torture you, Jo?” Dean asked as he swiped to answer without looking.

“Hello?” Dean asked as he pressed the phone to his ear.

“ _ Dean!” _

“Sammy?”

“ _ Yeah. I just… I’m freaking out Dean. I’ve been walking through the woods for over an hour, and I think I just heard someone following me. But it might just be my mind playing tricks. I dunno. It could be nothing, but… I… What am I supposed to do?  _ ”

“It’s okay Sam. Just listen to me and focus, alright? That’s all you gotta do right now. Got it?”

“ _ Okay. Yeah. _ ”

“Okay. First of all, whaddya got on you for protection?”

“ _ I have my Glock in my backpack and a little silver knife. That’s it. I don’t… Dean, I don’t even have extra ammo. Fuck. I was just going to visit Brady’s parents. I didn’t think-” _

“Sam, take a breath! Just calm down. You didn’t know, man. No sense worrying about it now. So you got your gun?”

“ _ Yeah _ .”

“Alright, so here’s what we’re gonna do, Sam; we’re gonna go with zombie movie rules.”

“ _ What? Dean, we don’t even know if these  _ are  _ zombies!” _

“Yeah, well, 9/10 a headshot’s gonna kill or at least slow down whatever supernatural son of a bitch we’re dealing with. You gotta remember though, you shoot that gun, every other evil fucker in earshot’s gonna be coming for you. So stay hidden, and stay quiet. Sammy, I know you know how to move silent. I taught you that shit. You know how to be stealthy. You’ve got this. Just get to Gabriel’s cottage. He’s gonna take care of you ‘til I get there, okay? That’s all you gotta focus on. Don’t think about the rest. I’m on my way.”

“ _ Okay.” _

\---

11:00pm, California

It had taken Sam nearly four hours of fighting through underbrush in the dark to get where he was. Which was very close to the GPS coordinates his brother had sent. He was tired and sweaty. Covered in scratches and bruises, starving, thirsty, and adrenaline still spiked in bursts with every little noise he heard. Basically he felt wrung out and ready to collapse. Thank God he was finally closing in.

Sam struggled a few more steps in the dark, and then noticed the high, eight foot-tall fence.  _ What the fuck? What kind of cottage has a giant fucking fence around it? _

Sam sighed, wondered if he should follow it right or left, then decided to pull up Google Maps, see if he could figure out which direction the road was in. The entrance must be out by the road. He pulled up the map, figured out that the road was to the right.

He shoved his phone back into his pocket, and stumbled along the wall, forced himself to keep going when all he wanted to do was sit down and rest for a bit.  _ I’m so close, just a little farther and I can relax. C’mon. I can do this. _

After what felt like an hour, but was probably closer to ten minutes or so, Sam finally found himself approaching the road. He ducked back into the tree line and watched for any signs of life. Made himself wait about five minutes just to make sure the area was really as deserted as it seemed.

When he saw no movement, he slipped from the trees and walked up to the front gate. There was an intercom jutting out from the wall, and Sam poked the button on it. He held his breath, hoped he’d found the right location.

“ _ Hello?  _ ”

“Hi. Is this Gabriel?”

“ _ Sure is, kid, and let me guess; you’re Sam?” _

“Yeah. My brother said Cas asked if it was okay for me to come here?”

“ _ Sure did. I’m buzzing you in now.” _

“Thanks, man.”

Sam let out a sigh of relief as the gate slid silently open, and almost as soon as he passed through, it slipped shut behind him. Sam felt like he could breathe for the first time in hours because he was finally safe. All of the terror and fear bled out of him as he walked up the driveway, and he slowly filled up with exhaustion.

He made himself keep putting one foot in front of the other, and now that the adrenaline was fading from his system, he could feel pain in his feet, blisters he assumed, and his thighs and ass hurt from the strain of climbing through the woods for hours. Sam was in pretty decent shape, but not  _ climb-through-the-woods-for-hours-nonstop  _ decent.

He managed to get himself up the front steps, and to the door. He’d just lifted his hand to knock when it was pulled open. Sam couldn’t make out the features of the man who stood in the doorway, the porch light was out, and there didn’t seem to be much light coming from inside. All Sam could really tell was that the guy was shorter than him and slim.

“Geez, kid, you look exhausted. Come on in. I’ll make you something to eat and then you can go pass out in the guest room.” Gabriel said, and Sam smiled at him before Gabriel stepped back to let him in.

“That sounds amazing. I just hiked for, like, four hours in the dark. I’m basically dead on my feet right now.” Sam told him as he followed him in through the door.

“You must be pretty tough. I probably would have just laid down and died. No way I could walk for that long.” Gabriel said while he led him into the kitchen.

In the glow of the light over the stove, Sam caught his first real glimpse of Gabriel. He had light brown shaggy hair that curled out around his ears, and his eyes, the color of bourbon, glittered in the dim room. His nose was straight and maybe just a touch long, but it somehow seemed perfect on his face. His lips looked soft and kissable-  _ wait, what? _

Sam mentally cut himself off in favor of responding to Gabriel’s comment.  

“You’d be surprised what you can do with a bit of adrenaline in your system.” Sam replied sleepily.

Gabriel’s eyes traveled appreciatively over Sam’s body from head to foot, like he was mentally cataloguing Sam as well before he realized how worn out Sam looked.

“Why don’t you take a seat, kid?” Gabriel offered as he waved a hand at the small round table that sat just on the other side of the kitchen.

Sam nodded before he crossed the room to slump heavily onto the wooden seat. He leaned forward and crossed his arms onto the table, rested his head on them and closed his eyes while he waited for Gabriel to find him some food.

His exhaustion must have overwhelmed him, because the next thing Sam knew Gabriel shook him gently awake.

“Hey, kid. I know you’re tired, but you gotta eat something first.” Gabriel told him gently and Sam tried not to whine as he forced himself to sit up. “Plus you should probably call your brother, let him know you’re alright.”

“Yeah.” Sam agreed, voice scratchy with sleep.

Man, how long had he passed out for? It couldn’t have been that long, but he felt like it had been hours and seconds at the same time.

“Here, eat this and then we’ll call your brother, okay?” Gabriel proposed as he pushed a grilled cheese sandwich on a white plate in front of Sam.

“Okay.” Sam mumbled as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and Gabriel pointedly did  _ not  _ think it was adorable; the kid couldn’t have been much more than eighteen and Gabriel was twenty-five, he should probably reign in any inappropriate thoughts he may or may not have been entertaining.

Sam dug into the sandwich and almost before Gabriel could blink, he polished it off. Gabriel wondered briefly if Sam had even bothered to chew. Sam sighed and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand before he noticed Gabriel staring at him.

“Sorry. Force of habit. When you live with Dean you learn to eat fast.” Sam said, embarrassed.

Gabriel chuckled, and took the plate to the sink.

“Well, that  _ is  _ basically older brother 101.” Gabriel admitted with a smirk. “Preceded by embarrass your sibling at every opportunity and followed by annoying nicknames.”

Sam laughed as Gabriel shrugged like it was just a fact of life that older brothers had to torture their younger siblings.

“Oh yeah? What’s your annoying nickname for Cas?” Sam asked with a grin and Gabriel’s eyes took on a mischievous glint as he smiled back.

“Pfft, Cassie, obviously. It’s perfect and it meets all the criteria; He hates it, it’s irritating and as a bonus, it’s also a girl’s name.” Gabriel joked, happy that Sam seemed to be in better spirits than he’d arrived in.

“Wow, man. That’s just cruel.” Sam said, but his eyes were smiling and his tone was light.

“Lemme guess, Dean calls you Sammy?” Gabriel supplied.

“Mostly he calls me Bitch, but when he’s feeling particularly generous he calls me Sammy.” Sam confirmed with a fond grimace.

“Speaking of feeling generous, we should probably let him know you’re safe. If he’s anything like me, he’ll be worried sick.” Gabriel said and Sam frowned, because he should have done that first thing, he knew what Dean was like when he worried.

“Yeah.” Sam conceded as he reached into his pocket to pull out his phone.


	4. Chapter 4

1:30 am, Saturday, Kansas

The signs that proclaimed they were nearing Colby, KS flashed by in the headlights, and Dean let out a sigh as he looked down at the gas gauge. They definitely needed to make a stop up here to grab gas and take a piss break.

The car was near silent aside from the quiet rock music that sang out from the radio; everyone else had drifted off to sleep a few hours ago and left Dean with nothing but his own thoughts for entertainment. And his brain was not a nice place to be right now. He hadn’t heard from Sammy in a few hours and his level of concern had dramatically spiked over the last hour. His panicked thoughts warred with themselves.

He wondered if he should call Sam, just find out if he was okay, but then what if he called and the sound gave Sam away?  _ Fuck  _ . He just wished his brother would hurry up and call.

Almost as if he’d felt his ears burning, Dean’s phone rang out and shattered the quiet. He grabbed it from the seat beside him and swiped it to answer.

“Sam? You okay?”

“ _ I’m  _ fine _ , Dean. I got to Gabriel’s. I’m safe.  _ ”

“Thank fuck.” Dean replied as relief flooded him.

“ _ Yeah, I’m exhausted though, so I’m gonna get some sleep. It was a hell of a walk here. But it’s secure, Dean. Gabriel’s got a massive fence, like at least eight feet tall, around the place, so I think we’re okay here. Maybe… maybe we should just wait it out? It’s kind of risky for you to come. I’m okay now…” _

“Fuck that, Sam.” Dean argued. “You don’t know that it’s not gonna get worse, or what’s going on there. I’m coming to get you and that’s final.”

“ _ Dean, you can’t come alone. That’s practically suicide. I’ve seen what these things are capable of, you can’t handle it on your own.  _ ”

“Good thing I’m not on my own then, goofball.” Dean replied. “I’ve got Cas, Benny, Jo and Michael. Plus Mom and Dad and probably Ellen and Bobby, are meeting us at the border before we come in after you.”

“ _ You brought Cas? And Benny and Michael? I mean Jo, yeah, she’d never let you leave her behind, but do Cas and them even know what they’re getting into?” _

“Listen, I tried to warn them, but they insisted, okay? And, man, turns out Benny  _ and  _ Michael already knew about supernatural bullshit.” Dean justified. “And I explained it to Cas, but he said he needed to help save his brother too.”

Dean glanced over at Castiel, who scrubbed a hand over his face and stifled a yawn as he sat straight up. His hair was even messier than usual, and the sight of him so vulnerable and undone tugged something in Dean’s chest.

Castiel’s eyes locked onto Dean’s for a moment, and then Castiel’s head cocked to the side just a little, and Dean had to bite the inside of his cheek and flick his eyes back to the road before he blurted out something stupid like how goddamn perfect and cute Castiel looked when he did that.

“ _ I still think it’s a bad idea for any of you to come.” _

“It’s not up for discussion Sammy. We’re coming to get you whether you like it or not, so suck it up, Bitch.”

“ _ You’re such a jerk sometimes.” _

“Pfft. I think I’m adorable.” Dean replied cheekily.

“ _ If by adorable you mean a pain in the ass, then sure, I agree with you. Hold on- Gabriel wants to talk to Cas.” _

“Sure. I’ll talk to you soon okay, Sam? Stay safe.”

“ _ You too, Dean.  _ ”

Dean sighed and held out the phone to Castiel, who looked at him quizzically before he accepted it.

“Your brother wants to talk to you apparently.”

Dean turned his focus back to the road as Castiel put the phone to his ear.

“Gabe?” Castiel asked.

“ _ Hey, Cassie.  _ ”  Gabriel greeted.

A short awkward silence hung between them as static crackled on the line.

“Did you want to tell me something or just hear the sound of your favorite brother’s voice?” Castiel joked with a wry grin.

“ _ Cas, listen, you don’t have to do this. I know you think you owe me, but you don’t. Being a good older brother, treating you like a human being, loving you, that’s not something I did for you. That’s not something you owe me anything for. Cas, that’s what you deserve. Just because our family is a bunch of uptight dicks and I’m the only other decent one of ‘em doesn’t mean you should throw your life away on some half-assed rescue mission. I’m not worth it. My life isn’t worth yours and I’d  _ never  _ ask you for that. I don’t  _ want  _ that.”  _ Gabriel implored him, emotion roiling in his voice.

“Gabe! Shut up! I’m not doing this out of a sense of responsibility, you ass!” Castiel objected vehemently. “You’re my brother and I love you, you dumb jerk! I can’t just leave you there to die. You can’t ask me to do that, Gabe. What if it were me? Would you just let me go?”

“ _ Of course not, kid. I’m your big brother. It’s part of the job description.  _ ”

“Then let me help you. I  _ need  _ you, Gabe. You’re the only one who listens to me. The only one who  _ never  _ gives me crap, who  _ never  _ makes me feel like a  _ freak  _ just for being myself. For fuck’s sake, you’re the only person in the  _ goddamn world  _ who loves me!” Castiel exclaimed as tears pricked at his eyes. “I can’t do this without you.”

“ _ Cas…  _ ”

“Gabe, I’m not giving up on you. Don’t ask me to.”

“ _ Alright, Cas. Just- just be careful, kiddo.” _

“You too.”

Castiel hung up the phone and set it back on the seat beside Dean. He avoided Dean’s eyes and stared out the passenger window, saw nothing but blackness as he fought the tears that had welled up in his eyes, tried to swallow them back down and ignore the fact that he’d woken everyone up with his impassioned plea.

Dean picked up the phone and tapped out a quick text to his mom, just to let her know that Sam was safe before he dropped it back onto the seat next to him.

\---

About ten minutes later, Dean pulled into the gas station. The occupants of the car all piled out to stretch their legs and most of them headed for the restrooms. Only Dean and Castiel remained at the pump.

Dean leaned against the back of the Impala as he pumped gas into her. Castiel was leaning against the passenger side as he  stared off down the street. Dean looked over at him when Castiel wrapped his arms around himself, and despite the fact Castiel was almost as tall and broad as Dean was, he looked so small right then. Like he was folded in on himself, and trying to hold his pieces together.

Dean’s chest tightened, and he needed to do or say something to wipe that lonely, lost look off of Castiel’s face.

“He’s not the only one, you know, Cas.” Dean’s voice was soft as he spoke, and Castiel turned his head to look at him, those blue eyes caught on Dean’s green.

Dean’s heart stuttered at the confusion on Castiel’s face, and nervousness licked through him, but Castiel needed to know this. Dean needed him to.

“What?” Castiel asked.

“Who loves you.” Dean said with a smile like pure warmth. “Gabe’s not the only one. I just, I wanted you to know that.”

Castiel’s lips parted, his brows drew up in surprise and his impossibly blue eyes widened before his expression melted into something gentler, something that made Dean’s heart pound in his chest.

“Dean…” Castiel breathed, he studied every inch of Dean’s face, tried to figure out if Dean meant it the way he hoped he did, if Dean felt the same, and his heart rate stumbled when all he found was honesty and caring and he wanted to ask, wanted to clarify, but the bell above the gas station jingled and he forced his eyes away from Dean’s as everyone filed back out to the car.


	5. Chapter 5

9:00am, California

Sam yawned and stretched in the warm bed. Sunlight streamed through the window and he cracked his eyes open to see little dust motes dancing in the golden beams. He blinked a few times as his eyes focused on the room around him. Memories of the day before flooded his mind as the aches in his body made themselves known.

Sam groaned and rubbed his palms into his closed eyes. If he’d been sore last night, that was nothing compared to right now. His legs were tense and weak, his thighs burned from chafing and his back felt like a twisted pretzel of pain. That didn’t even include all the little scrapes and various bruises that throbbed for his attention.

For a moment, Sam just wanted to wallow in his misery before he forced himself to toughen up and get on with his day. He stared at the slanted pine ceiling above him and let his eyes glide along the beams, focused his attention outside of himself instead of dwelling on the physical complaints his body screamed at him.

Finally, he managed to drag himself upright and he pulled a pair of pajama pants from his backpack over his grey boxer-briefs. He needed a shower pretty desperately, the dirt and dried sweat from his trek through the woods still clung to him and he wrinkled his nose. Sam grabbed his backpack and made himself head out into the cottage in search of Gabriel.

As soon as his door was open, the mouthwatering scent of bacon and pancakes filled the air. Sam’s stomach rumbled hungrily and he grinned when he walked into the kitchen to see Gabriel in a pair of red and black flannel pajama bottoms, a black t-shirt stretched over his back and a frilly pink apron tied around his neck and waist.

Soft music played from the radio, and Gabriel bounced his hips to the beat as he cooked, completely unaware he had an audience. He tossed a pancake high in the air, and it flipped over a couple of times before landing perfectly back in the pan.

Honestly, it was fucking adorable, and domestic and ridiculous, and Sam couldn’t tell you why he somehow found it all incredibly attractive but he did. In the early morning light that filled the kitchen, Gabriel looked much younger than he had the night before. He seemed to be in his element, and Sam was loathe to interrupt him, but he had a crazy urge to see those melted caramel eyes focused on him.

“Morning.” Sam greeted softly to announce his presence.

Gabriel jumped and let out a little undignified squeak as he spun around and Sam laughed at the guilty expression on his face.

“Sam! I thought you’d be sleeping a bit longer.” Gabriel confessed as he reached up to untie the dorky apron he was sporting,  _ God, this is embarrassing. _

“Hey, no, leave it.” Sam told him with a smile as Gabriel’s cheeks heated in a blush, and  _ fuck, wasn’t that just goddamn hot?  _ “I think it’s pretty adorable.”

“Sam Winchester, I’m  _ not  _ adorable. I’m a twenty-five year old  _ man _ . An extremely  _ masculine  _ man.” Gabriel insisted with a wry grin.

“Who just happens to own and wear a frilly pink apron?” Sam teased and he tried not to laugh at the way Gabriel’s hands smoothed over the front of the apron self-consciously.

“What? This old thing? Totally masculine.” Gabriel argued with a smirk. “Obviously I’m  _ so  _ masculine that wearing the frou-frou apron my dork of a little brother got me as a gag-gift doesn’t threaten said masculinity.”

“I’ll agree with you there. It takes a fairly  _ comfortable  _ guy to wear something so…  _ pretty  _ .” Sam teased again with a playful smile.

“So, now that we’ve agreed I’m clearly an alpha male; how did you sleep?” Gabriel asked changing the subject as he turned back to plate the pancake and pour more batter into the pan.

“Like a baby, totally dead to the world.” Sam confided.

“Kid, have you ever had a baby overnight? They sleep terribly. They’re up every couple hours crying. I babysat a friend’s kid once when she had an emergency and it was easily the worst night of my life. Worse than the night I tried to prank my brother Luke and he figured out the prank and made it backfire on me. I was grounded for months  _ and  _ it took two weeks for the smell to go away. And the lack of sleep from a baby was  _ worse _ .” Gabriel rambled as he continued to make pancakes.

Sam chuckled at his story and rolled his eyes. He didn’t know why, but he already liked Gabriel, could tell they’d make good friends. Maybe something else too. He certainly knew he found the guy attractive.

“Fine, I slept like the dead.” Sam corrected and Gabriel flashed a grin over his shoulder at him. “Mind if I take a quick shower?”

“Go ahead, kid, I’ll be a bit longer finishing this up anyway.” Gabriel replied easily. “Towels are in the closet next to the bathroom.”

“Thanks.” Sam said.

“No problem, Sam.” Gabriel answered, and Sam’s heart skipped a little before he recovered enough to head for the shower.

Back down the hall, Sam found the linen closet and rifled through to grab a towel. He yawned as he dragged one out and headed into the bathroom. The towel got hung on the rack next to the shower and Sam fiddled with the taps until the water was just short of scalding. His sore muscles needed heat, plus he’d always loved hot showers.

Sam pulled the lever to switch the water flow to the shower head, then stood back and stripped out of his grimy clothes before he climbed into the shower and pulled the curtain.

The hot water on his skin stung at first over every scrape, made Sam hiss out a sharp breath but soon that gave way to a pleasant numbness as the heat soaked into him. He took his time, thoroughly scrubbed Gabriel’s Old Spice 2 in 1 body wash and shampoo into his hair and skin and then rinsed himself off leisurely.

Once he was clean Sam leaned forward under the spray until he propped himself up against the wall with one forearm and the water sluiced soothingly down his back. God, that was nice. Just having a moment to relax and really soak up the heat.

“Hey Sam!” Gabriel called through the door and Sam mumbled a reply before Gabriel continued. “Breakfast’s ready whenever you are, but take your time if you want. I stuck it in the warmer until you’re ready.”

At the sound of Gabriel’s voice so close, a certain part of Sam’s anatomy perked up a little and Sam glanced down at his suddenly half-hard dick. He rolled his eyes at his own body before he answered.

“Okay. I’m almost done in here.”

Sam debated for a moment whether he was really about to jerk off in a near stranger’s shower to the sound of his voice. His cock bobbed at the thought and Sam’s decision was made. He sucked in his bottom lip as he slid his hand down to fist around his length, lazily stroked himself until he was fully hard.

Pleasure swirled through Sam’s body and he fought back a groan. Breathed hard through his nose as he pumped his fist over his cock, rubbed his thumb over the ridge under the head of it. Images burst into his mind, each hotter than the last.

_ Gabriel pulling him down into a hard kiss, his tongue sliding hot into Sam’s mouth to taste and explore. Gabriel’s hands drifting down over Sam’s chest, pinching and teasing his nipples into hard nubs before one of his hands slips down to Sam’s cock and squeezes. Gabriel’s other hand suddenly between Sam’s legs, fingers lube-slick and one’s pressing unhurriedly into Sam, keeping his pace torturously slow until Sam begs for another finger, and another until he can’t take it anymore and Gabriel thrusts his hard cock into Sam and- _

Sam came, his cock spurted hot white ropes of come onto the shower wall as ecstasy slammed into him with all the force of a major league fastball. Bonelessly, Sam sagged against the wall for a moment; basked in the afterglow of his frankly fucking fantastic orgasm, and then sighed to himself before he rinsed the wall clean.

With a regretful sigh, already missing the warm heat of the water, Sam turned off the shower and got out. After he dried off, Sam wrapped his towel securely around his waist and made his way back to the room he’d been staying in.

In his backpack he found his last clean pair of boxers, jeans and a white t-shirt. He dressed in a rush. Now that he was freshly washed, he had nothing left to focus on except how hungry he was.

When Sam got back to the kitchen, Gabriel turned to smile at him and froze, eyes wide. Sam’s hair flopped wetly around his face, and his tight t-shirt clung to him in wet spots and  _ fuck _ , his cheeks were flushed from the heat of the shower. Gabriel had to mentally shake himself before his jaw  _ actually  _ dropped open as pretty much every bit of blood in his body flooded straight into his groin.

“What?” Sam asked, suddenly nervous when Gabriel stared at him a beat longer than it felt normal.

“Hmm?” Gabriel asked as his eyebrows shot up. “Oh, nothing! Hope you’re hungry, I made a  _ ton  _ of pancakes.”


	6. Chapter 6

8:00am, Utah

Dean yawned wide and rubbed his eyes as he steered the car off at exit 164 toward Green River, UT. He followed the sign to turn right for the gas station, drove about a quarter mile up and pulled into a Gas-N-Go.

As soon as Dean parked the car at a pump, he let out a tired sigh. Rested his head on the wheel and closed his eyes for a moment. He’d driven for over twelve hours straight, and hadn’t slept in over twenty-four. Exhaustion licked at him, but he needed to just push through because they were only about half-way to Gabriel’s cabin.

So far they hadn’t seen any unusual signs of supernatural activity, just a steady stream of cars heading in the opposite direction they were headed in. People, sane people anyway, were trying to get as far away from California as possible.

Dean kept his eyes closed a moment longer, just rested them and then jumped a little when a warm hand settled on his back. His shoulders relaxed the second he realized it was Castiel.

“Hey.” Castiel prodded as he watched Dean. “We should fill up and keep going.”

Dean nodded sleepily against the wheel as Castiel’s hand rubbed his back soothingly, and  _ fuck,  _ that felt awesome. The warmth of Castiel’s hand seeped through his shirt and heated his skin. Dean let out a soft groan at the sensation before he realized where they were and his head shot up embarrassed.

Castiel smirked at him knowingly as Dean’s eyes flew to the rearview to check if the others had heard. He was startled to see the back seat empty. His gaze returned to Castiel for an explanation.

“They already went in to pee and grab food. You fell asleep almost the second you put it in park.” Castiel informed him.

“Yeah, well, driving for half a day on no sleep really wears a guy out. Who knew, huh?” Dean joked with a lopsided smile.

His smile froze as Castiel slid closer to him on the bench seat and one of Castiel’s hands came up to cup his cheek. Dean’s eyes stayed locked onto Castiel’s, the intensity in them was focused on him, and Dean’s whole body lit up like floodlights on a football field.

“So, earlier, when you said Gabe wasn’t the only one. How did you mean that?” Castiel asked uncertainly as he brushed his thumb over Dean’s cheekbone.

Then it was Dean’s turn to smirk, because  _ this  _ he knew how to do. This was something he could deal with. So Dean leaned in slowly, watched as Castiel’s bright blue eyes got impossibly wider as Dean got closer, and then fluttered closed when Dean finally breached the distance and pressed their lips together in a kiss that felt like the answer to every question he’d ever had.

Dean kept the pressure light at first, just barely grazing Castiel’s lips with his, tiny little kisses that steadily deepened until Dean’s tongue licked over the seam of Castiel’s lips and they parted, allowed him to slide his tongue into Castiel’s mouth.

A soft, hungry noise rumbled in Castiel’s chest when their tongues met, and it scorched like fire under Dean’s skin. Dean echoed it with his own groan as he sank his hands into Castiel’s hair, pulled him closer.

Dean’s shirt bunched in Castiel’s hands as he fisted the material, like he was trying to keep him there, like he had to hold onto Dean as tightly as he could or this moment would melt away.

_ God,  _ Castiel had wanted this for so long, and it felt so  _ good  _ to finally be kissing Dean. Light-headed and drunk on the slide of Dean’s tongue as it swirled around his own, Castiel arched into it. Then Dean sucked Castiel’s tongue into his mouth and Castiel  _ burned _ .

Before he knew he’d even moved, he found that he’d straddled Dean, his knees on either side of Dean’s thighs, and the steering wheel was digging into his back, but he didn’t care because he  _ needed  _ to feel Dean against him. And judging by the way Dean panted into his mouth, and slid his hands down to grip Castiel’s hips tightly, he was definitely on board too.

Dean groaned loudly at the feel of Castiel in his lap, heavy and solid over where he ached in his jeans, so fucking hot. He tightened his fingers bruisingly around Castiel’s hips, and smoothed his thumbs over his hipbones. Castiel arched into his touch and moaned unashamedly into his mouth.  _ Jesus _ , why the fuck had he waited so long to do this?

“God, you taste so fucking good, Cas. You  _ feel  _ so fucking good.” Dean mumbled against his lips and Castiel groaned at his words.

Everything about Castiel felt  _ right _ ; the scrape of their stubble as they kissed, the weight of him settled on Dean’s lap, the solid, muscular wall of his chest pressed to Dean’s, the way his strong arms were wrapped around Dean’s shoulders, the way he held onto him and let out breathy little huffs of hot air as Dean fucked his mouth with his tongue and used his grip on Castiel’s hips to grind him down against his hard cock; fuck, the way he could feel Castiel’s own dick hard against his stomach. All of it felt amazing and perfect and  _ goddamn  _ intoxicating.

Castiel moaned into Dean’s mouth, overwhelmed, head fuzzy with desire, sex had  _ never  _ felt like this. This wasn’t even  _ sex  _ yet, and sex had never felt this good; this was honest and hungry and sweet and passionate at the same time. Something about this was  _ different  _ than all the other times,  _ Dean  _ was different and Castiel reveled in it.

“Dean, I  _ need-”  _ Castiel broke off in a gasp as Dean rolled his hips obscenely up.

“Yeah? What do you  _ need _ , Cas?” Dean asked as he scrutinized Castiel’s face.

Castiel’s head was tipped back, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, his cheeks flushed pink and his lips were parted and swollen and spit-slick. He looked fucking debauched and Dean loved it, loved that he’d been the one to put that look on Castiel’s face, to make him feel that out of control.

“I  _ need- I need  _ you.” Castiel practically growled as he leaned down to capture Dean’s lips with his once more.

All of a sudden a chorus of cheers and claps erupted around the car and they broke apart to see what the fuck was going on.

Dean flushed red with embarrassment when he saw their friends standing there, laughing and applauding them. Castiel on the other hand, just smirked and shrugged, turned back to press a soft, sweet kiss to Dean’s lips before he slid off of him and shifted back to his own seat.

Jo was the first to open the back door and slip in behind them. With a deep breath, Dean tried to will away the raging hard-on that currently tented his pants while he also attempted to prepare himself for the inevitable words that were going to explode out of Jo’s mouth.

“Oh my god! I can’t fucking believe this. I just… I never thought you two would figure your shit out!” She exclaimed enthusiastically with a broad grin. “I mean, we’ve all known for years, but you guys were so clueless.”

Dean turned to glare at her, but the wide smile on her face was so genuinely happy that he just couldn’t find it in him to be really irritated.

“Shut up, Jo.” He half-heartedly protested.

“No, I’m serious. I honestly thought we’d have to lock you two in a room with a bottle of lube and some condoms before the end of school this year. Ask Michael, I’ve suggested it so many times!” Jo teased as Michael and Benny finally climbed into the car.

“It’s true, she really has.” Michael agreed with her. “Lucky for you guys Benny always managed to convince her you’d figure it out on your own.”

“You’re welcome for that.” Benny rumbled with a wink.

“Speaking of which, babe, this means you owe Benny a hundred bucks.” Michael reminded Jo.

Dean wanted to be pissed that his friends had been making bets on whether or not they’d hook up, but he could still taste Castiel’s tongue in his mouth, so he decided not to care.

“Aww, fuck.” Jo cursed, as she shot a glare at Dean and Castiel. “Couldn’t hold out for two more months, could you?”

“ _ Excuse me for not consulting you first.  _ ” Dean said as he rolled his eyes. “Next time I’ll finalize the details with you first, Overlord.”

“Hmm. Overlord, huh, I kinda like the sound of that. I think it should be my new nickname.” Jo said cheerfully.

“I’ll get right on that.” Dean replied sarcastically. “I’m gonna run to the washroom before we take off. Benny, will you fill her up while I’m in there?”

“Sure can.” Benny agreed readily.

“I’m coming in too.” Castiel announced.

“Ew, guys, you can’t have your first time in a grody gas station bathroom.” Jo said with a grimace and Castiel laughed.

“Jesus Christ, Jo!” Dean exclaimed. “I just need to take a leak. You’re such a perv!”

“Oh yeah? Well, I wasn’t the one grinding all up on my boyfriend where the whole gas station could see.” Jo said with a raised eyebrow.

Dean turned bright red again and Castiel laughed harder before he calmed himself enough to speak.

“She’s got you there, Dean.” Castiel said with a grin that made the corners of his eyes crinkle with happiness.

“Whose side are you on, anyway?” Dean asked, looking at Castiel like he’d betrayed him.

“Yours. Always.” Castiel assured him, and then rolled his eyes at the chorus of aww’s that filled the car.

“You guys suck.” Dean informed them before he got out of the car.

“We love you too, Dean!” Jo called after him.

Castiel followed him into the station and they quickly made their way to the washroom. Dean was only a little disappointed that they both behaved appropriately and just relieved themselves before they washed their hands and headed back into the station to grab some snacks while they waited for Benny to finish up with the pump so that Dean could pay.

Tiredly, Dean smiled to himself. Watched as Castiel picked out candy, those gorgeous blue eyes laser focused on the rows of junk that he examined. Castiel must have felt his gaze, because his eyes shifted, and found Dean’s.

The emotions swirling in Castiel’s eyes swallowed Dean up; all warmth and desire and something bigger that made heat pulse in Dean’s chest. It took every single bit of willpower that Dean possessed not to just throw himself into Castiel’s arms and kiss him breathless because now that he was allowed to do that, how the fuck was he supposed to stop?

“Know what you want?” Castiel asked him as he gestured at the candy in front of them.

“I’m gonna grab some chips and chocolate bars. Maybe some energy drinks so I can get through this drive.” Dean answered honestly as he barely suppressed a yawn.

“Maybe…” Castiel began, but then cut himself off and looked back at the candy.

“Maybe what?” Dean asked curiously.

“I was just thinking, maybe I should drive for a bit? Then you could get some sleep.” Castiel said gently, like the idea would offend Dean.

Which, honestly, it normally would have. Everyone knew that the only person allowed to drive the Impala was Dean. But this was Castiel, and Dean trusted him with everything he had.

“Yeah, sure. That would be great. I’m exhausted.” Dean replied, and the huge grin that spread over Castiel’s face told Dean that Castiel knew exactly how much it meant for Dean to admit that.

“Alright then. Let’s pay and get out of here.” Castiel said as he randomly grabbed some candy boxes from the display.

Dean nodded as a soft smile played on his lips. He quickly grabbed himself some snacks and energy drinks for after his nap and then met Castiel up at the cash.

After they paid Dean stopped Castiel just outside of the gas station door to hand him the keys. Castiel took them and the smile he gave Dean was like pure sunshine; warm and bright and amazing. Dean couldn’t stop himself from leaning in to taste that smile, just for a moment, before they walked back to the car.


	7. Chapter 7

6:00pm, Nevada

Castiel pulled the car into Tonopah, NV and let out a yawn as he steered the car into the gas station. It was the second stop he’d had to make to refill the car. Dean had been so tired he’d slept right through the last one, and the two-hours they’d taken at a rest-stop to stretch their legs, snoring softly, with his jacket tucked up between the window and his head as a pillow.

He smiled as he put the car in park, and looked over at Dean still snoring away next to him.

“Alright, I gotta pee!” Jo whispered loudly from the middle of the back seat. “Get out of the way!”

Michael laughed quietly, but quickly acquiesced and climbed out to let Jo get out of the car. Benny looked between Castiel and Dean for a moment before throwing a kind smile at Castiel as he left and closed the door behind himself. Castiel watched fondly as their friends headed into the gas station before he leaned over to gently wake Dean.

Smiling Castiel gently pressed his lips to Dean’s. Whisper soft, just soft light touches and barely there pressure. He felt the moment that Dean woke; Dean’s lips curved up into a smile, and he pressed forward into the kisses, returned them with an enthusiasm that made heat curl deliciously in Castiel’s gut.

Not wanting to have a repeat of earlier and he knew that was exactly where things were headed, Castiel pulled back before the kisses could deepen too much.

“Hey, sleepyhead.” Cas murmured, voice rough and low.

“Mmm. Fuck I love your voice like that.” Dean replied as he stretched his arms and arched his back with a loud groan. “How long did I sleep?”

“Well, it’s about six o’clock-ish.” Castiel informed him, and Dean’s eyes popped open with surprise. “You slept through the last stop and now we’re in Tonopah. I’m ready to switch if you are.”

“Mmm. Just gimme a few minutes to wake up.” Dean grumbled as he scrubbed his hands over his face and pouted a little at having been woken up.

“You never were a morning person.” Castiel mused.

“It’s not morning.” Dean grumpily pointed out.

“No, but it’s still adorable how grumpy you are.” Castiel teased him as he ran a hand through Dean’s hair, messing it up a little more than it already was.

“No. Maybe. Shut up! You are.” Dean fumbled lamely as his cheeks heated pink.

“Oh. Well, that’s just not fair.” Castiel groaned and reached out to run his thumb over the blush that stained Dean’s cheeks before he surged forward to kiss Dean hard and deep and just a little desperately.

Dean kissed back with equal passion. One of his hands slid up to rest against the side of Castiel’s neck and he buried the other in the glorious dark brown mess of Castiel’s hair. At the same time, Castiel’s hand trailed down to rest on Dean’s bicep and just held on there as he let himself drown in the sensation of Dean’s tongue as it slipped hotly against his.

He was quickly becoming addicted to the taste and feel of Dean, and he wasn’t sure that was a bad thing at all. Not if it felt  _ this  _ good. Still, Castiel forced himself to slow as he bit down gently on Dean’s bottom lip then dragged it through his teeth as he pulled back. Dean let out a sharp exhale at the feeling and desire slammed harder into him as his eyes opened to see Castiel flushed and disheveled.

Castiel grinned at him as they locked eyes, and Dean grinned back;  _ fuck, I love him. _

“This is such bad timing on our part.” Castiel lamented as he reached down to adjust himself.

“Oh, what? A, uh, a cross country road trip to save our brothers with a car full of our best friends is suddenly a bad time to admit our feelings for each other?” Dean scoffed with a smirk.

Castiel just grinned and kissed him again, before he leaned back just enough to speak.

“Yes, but you have no idea how  _ damn  _ long I’ve wanted to do this for. How many times I’ve imagined it.” Castiel told him and heat surged in Dean’s gut.

“Yeah? Did you fantasize about me, Cas?” Dean asked, voice pitched low and hot. “Did you touch yourself and imagine it was my hand? Or maybe my mouth? Or were you fucking me? Was I fucking you?”

Castiel groaned at Dean’s words, his cock twitching near painfully in his pants, and all he could do was nod through the lust that coursed through his body and swamped his mind.  _ Fucking Christ _ , Dean was hot.

“Me too, Cas.” Dean agreed heatedly as he kissed Castiel frantic and rushed one last time before he cracked his door open to go pump the gas.

Castiel let out a sigh, and adjusted himself again. It really was terrible timing. He wanted Dean,  _ badly _ , and there was no time. Castiel gave himself a few moments for his body to calm down; thought about every disgusting thing he could dredge up to kill his boner.

When he finally got himself under control, he slipped out of the car, and walked back to where Dean was pumping the gas.

Just briefly before he leaned up against the back of the Impala, Castiel smiled at Dean and then he looked off down the road, content just to be standing next to him. The arid desert road was just another reminder that they were getting closer to California, and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t worried about what was going to happen once they got there.

Anxiety suddenly churned in Dean's gut while he watched Castiel staring into the distance. They were closing in on California, and it was going to be full of danger and supernatural crap and probably fucking  _ demons _ . What kind of asshole drags the person he loves into that?

Dean rubbed a hand over his face and forced the guilt down. He needed to focus on what needed to be done. And that was to go grab and fill some gas cans. They might not have access to gas stations once they crossed the California border, and even if they did, stopping would be risky. Better to just stock up on enough to get them in and out.


	8. Chapter 8

5:00pm, California

The smell of steak searing wafted through the air and Sam’s mouth watered. Gabriel stood over the stove as he watched the meat cook intently. Further down the counter, Sam coarsely chopped broccoli, the only vegetable Gabriel had in his fridge. When Sam had asked Gabriel why broccoli he’d been informed broccoli smothered in cheese sauce was exempted from its status as a vegetable. Sam had rolled his eyes.

It didn't take long for Sam to complete his task, and then he dumped the broccoli into a pot of water and set it on a burner. Gabriel stiffened a little when Sam leaned over him to reach the burner, but when Sam looked to see what was wrong, Gabriel had a smile pasted on his face, so he brushed it off.

Gabriel let out a slow exhale as Sam moved back to sit at the table; when Sam had leaned in close, it’d taken everything Gabriel had not to turn his head just a little so that their faces would brush. He had a feeling it wouldn’t take much to start something with Sam, not with the way the kid kept looking at him, but despite what a lot of people would tell you, he did have morals. One of which apparently included not taking advantage of young college kids who were dependent on him for survival.  _ Who’d a thunk? _

Later, after supper, they wound up on the couch, Sam curled up on one end and Gabriel on the other, but they turned on the TV only to find that the cable was out. The two of them stared at the static on the screen in silence as they both scrambled for something to say that would break the quiet.

Neither wanted to admit how deeply troubling they found the fact that their source for news and information was suddenly gone.

“I have boardgames!” Gabriel announced a little too enthusiastically and Sam’s eyebrows shot up in response.

“Oh yeah?” Sam asked with a smirk.

“Yep. Um, let’s see, I have Life, Monopoly, Clue, Pictionary, Guess Who… I think that’s it. Wanna play one? Help pass the time?” Gabriel asked more reservedly.

“Sure, how about Guess Who?” Sam suggested as his smile spread wider and a bit of nostalgia washed through him.

That was how they’d ended up sprawled on the living room floor as they played Guess Who. By the time they’d gotten bored of playing, any awkwardness between them had evaporated. Gabriel made Sam laugh easily, and for some reason, he’d been able to do the same for Gabriel. It wasn’t that Sam was never funny, but he didn’t really think of himself as a funny guy, so whenever his jokes hit the mark with Gabriel, something warm pooled in his stomach.

It didn’t hurt that Gabriel’s eyes sparkled whenever he laughed, and it sent a little stab of longing through Sam each time he did it.

Eventually they ended up sitting back against the couch, side by side, shoulders nearly touching as they swapped stories about their brothers.

“Okay, but this one time, Cassie was probably like maybe 12? Anyway, I thought it would be hilarious to put itching powder in his underwear, right? Only the little shit figured it out before he ever put them on. I still have no fucking clue how, but anyway, he dug out the little stash of porn I had hidden under my bed in a shoebox, like every teenage boy, ever. Anyway, so the little fucker writes ‘Gabriel’s’ on it in sharpie and leaves it on our mom’s bed.” Gabriel said as he gestured wildly with his hands.

“Oh, wow. That’s… awkward.” Sam said with a laugh.

“You’re telling me! That’s not even the worst of it. It was right around when I figured out I was into guys too, so the contents were fairly… varied… Fortunately for me, mom thought the whole thing was a prank by one of my brothers to get back at me, ‘cause she knew I wouldn’t be dumb enough to leave porn on her bed. Didn’t get in a lick of trouble. Never did get my porn back though.” Gabriel complained.

Sam laughed again and shook his head gently, eyes amused as he looked over at Gabriel. They were so close together that there was no way Sam could’ve missed it when Gabriel’s eyes darted down to his lips. Sam could just, he could just lean in a little and that would be that; he could feel Gabriel’s lips against his, taste him and fuck, Sam wanted that.

When Gabriel’s eyes flashed back up to Sam’s he only had time to raise his eyebrows in surprise before Sam leaned forward and pressed their lips together, just a soft kiss before he pulled back a little.

“Is this okay?” Sam asked huskily, and Gabriel surged forward and sealed their lips together again in answer.

Gabriel’s tongue dragged over Sam’s lips and Sam melted into the kiss, his tongue met Gabriel’s and pleasure swirled through him. His hand slid into Gabriel’s hair as Gabriel’s hands gripped his biceps and tugged him closer.

Almost as quickly as it started Gabriel broke away, and dropped his head back onto the couch, his face flushed, lips puffy and wet.

“Sam…” He mumbled, and Sam looked at him, confused. “I can’t. Listen, I really like you. A lot. It just, uh, it feels like I’m taking advantage of you right now.”

“Um, how, exactly? I kissed you first.” Sam replied, one eyebrow raised.

“I dunno, we’re in the middle of a traumatic experience? And there’s this sense of dread hanging over everything? I just don’t wanna be your ‘last night on earth’ cheesy pick-up line fling, and I don’t want you to be mine. I think we should take it slow, and hey, we both survive this? We’ll do it right.” Gabriel offered.

“Yeah. Okay.” Sam agreed as a sappy warmth filled his chest. “So is that a no on kissing altogether? Or just, no sex?”


	9. Chapter 9

7:00pm, Nevada

Coaldale, Nevada was less of a ghost town and more a smattering of worn out abandoned buildings in the desert. The sun burned low in the evening sky, not all that far off from setting when Dean pulled the car to a stop near a couple of abandoned trailers.

For a moment Dean considered whether he should disregard John’s order to wait, they’d lose a couple of hours if he waited; John had texted him to let him know they’d arrive around nine-o’clock with Bobby and Ellen.

Apparently it’d taken them awhile to gear up and check the lore just in case they could find anything like what they were dealing with. When they’d come up empty handed they’d decided to just load up a veritable arsenal and head out.

“I’m gonna check out the area. Make sure it’s really as abandoned as it looks. Why don’t you guys wait here?” Dean announced.

“Dean-” Castiel started to disagree with a frown, but Dean cut him off.

“Just trust me, okay? Let me do this.” Dean insisted as he stared hard at Castiel, until Castiel held his hands up in surrender and shrugged.

Jo didn’t say anything, but she rolled her eyes when Dean caught her gaze in the rearview mirror before he grabbed the keys and headed to the trunk.

Dean unlocked the trunk, and shifted their various bags so he could prop the hidden compartment open. He surveyed the contents, and settled on the Colt, a flask of holy water that he tucked into his pants, and a silver knife. That should cover most bases, he figured, unless there were ghosts.  _ Shit, better grab the iron chain too just in case. _

It’d be just his luck to leave it behind, and run into a ghost. He wound the length of chain around his forearm, and then slammed the trunk.

It didn’t take him long to scout the area, there weren’t all that many places something could hide, and nothing turned up when he searched the interior of the buildings. Satisfied that they were safe for the time being, he headed back to the car, still fighting himself about waiting.

Sam was in danger, and every fiber of his being demanded that he waste no time getting to him. But John had given him an order and Dean, ever the good soldier, had always followed John’s orders. Still, Sam needed him right now. Worry and guilt clawed at him as he closed the distance to the Impala.

It was when he caught sight of his friends in the car that it really hit him; they needed him too. They needed him to play this smart and keep them safe. If he went in half-cocked, without backup, he could wind up getting them all killed. And that was something Dean couldn’t live with.

Fear, responsibility and uncertainty roiled in Dean’s gut; even if they waited for John and the others, something could still happen to one of them. What if one of them got hurt, or, worse, killed?

It’d be all his fault. He needed to let them know exactly the stakes, and even though he’d already laid it out for them, he needed to do it again. Especially for Benny, Jo and Michael; they didn’t have a stake in this fight, they were there for Sam and him, and Dean needed to make sure they really understood what they were getting into here.

He quickly stored his gear back in the trunk before he ducked his head in through the open driver’s window.

“Can I talk to you guys out here?” Dean asked solemnly.

An assortment of nods and grumbles met his question and they all exited the car. Dean stood back to look at his friends as he worked out what exactly he wanted to say.

“Guys, I know we already had this talk, but I need you to really understand what could happen, and I want you to know there’s still time to back out. We have no idea what we’re up against. Bobby combed the lore and couldn’t find a trace of what this is.” Dean said as he looked at each of them in turn.

“The closest he got is the lost colony of Roanoake. It’s a whole colony that up and disappeared way back when, anyway, the only thing they found was the word Croatoan. So Bobby thinks this might be what happened to the colony. Something like what’s going on in California. Even that’s not much to go on. You  _ gotta  _ realize how dangerous this is, you could get  _ hurt _ , or  _ killed _ . You could watch your friends be  _ killed in front of you _ .” Dean swallowed hard at the thought before he forced himself to continue.

“Obviously I really hope that doesn’t happen, but the thing is guys,  _ I don’t know it won’t _ . So I want you to be good and sure that you know what you’re in for if you come along. If you change your mind, that’s totally fine, I know it’s a lot to ask from you. Bobby, Ellen, Mom and Dad will be here in a few hours and I’m sure we could work it out so that whoever wants to leave can take one of the cars. Anyway, that’s all I wanted to say, because you guys are important to me, and I want you to be sure this is what you want…” Dean trailed off at the end of his speech as a lump formed in throat and choked the rest of his words.

“You already know I’m completely on board.” Castiel said simply.

When Castiel smirked at him, he smiled back and Dean’s heart beat faster with a mix of love and anxiety that made him feel wrung out.

“Man, when Dean Winchester asks you for a favor, he’s not screwin’ around.” Benny scoffed. “You know I’d do anything for you, Dean. Of course I’m in, brother.”

Jo’s hands were on her hips and a glare narrowed her eyes when Dean looked over at her.

“Dean Henry Winchester, I’m offended that you’d even ask! Sam’s like a little brother to me too, ya know. I love that kid, and I’ll be damned if I’m not going to help you haul his ass outta the frying pan.” Jo said, and Dean had to grin at her fierce determination.

And then Jo turned her eyes on Michael and her expression softened to one of concern. She’d barely parted her lips to speak when Michael piped up.

“There’s no way I’m letting you go without me Joanna Beth, so don’t give me that look. I love you, and whatever happens, I’ll be there with you.” Michael simply told her, warmth in his every word.

“Michael…” Jo sighed before she kissed him gently while she cupped his face in her hands. “I love you too. So much.”

\---

They still had just about two hours to kill, and they decided to split up. Benny wanted to take a nap in the back seat of the car, Jo and Michael opted to sneak off to spend some time alone together, which Dean mercilessly teased them for in retaliation.

That left Dean and Castiel to find something to do. Dean sighed and suggested the two of them take a walk in the rapidly fading sunlight. As they walked Castiel slipped his hand into Dean’s and felt a reassuring comfort when Dean threaded their fingers together and squeezed his hand.

They walked aimlessly while the last light from the sun sank below the horizon and it was almost full dark out when Castiel really let himself think about the fact that in a few hours either of them could die. The thought hung heavy and suffocating over them, and Castiel felt a desperate urge to be as close to Dean as he could be; To soak up every drop of him, of this thing between them and let it sink into his skin.

Just up ahead through the darkness, Castiel spotted an abandoned trailer, and he led Dean behind it, and out of sight. As soon as they rounded the back, Castiel pushed himself into Dean, pinned him up against the wall with his body and sealed their mouths together in an intense kiss that made Dean groan into his mouth.

Castiel’s body heated at the sound, his blood rushed south and he  _ wanted  _ Dean, so damn much. Dean was just as frenzied as Castiel felt; his hands slid down Castiel’s back and slipped under his t-shirt to feel Castiel’s bare skin against his palms and the touch was electric.

Dean harshly pulled him closer. Castiel went willingly as he licked into Dean’s mouth, his tongue slipped against Dean’s. Rocked his hips forward and  _ fuck _ , the brush of their half hard cocks through their pants was like a wildfire of sensation.

Then Castiel reached down and grabbed Dean’s wrists, grasped them with one of his hands above their heads and Dean loved it. Under the onslaught of Castiel grinding against him, kissing him and just physically dominating him, Dean’s cock rapidly hardened. It pushed every damn button he had when Castiel roughly unbuckled Dean's belt, popped the button of his jeans and yanked down the zipper.

Demanding and clingy, too fast. Castiel knew it but he didn’t care, not with the way Dean moaned right into his mouth, and writhed between him and the wall. He tugged Dean’s pants and boxers down to mid-thigh in a fluid movement that surprised both of them and then before Dean even had time to suck in a breath Castiel licked his palm and wrapped it around Dean’s hard cock.

Loosely, he gripped Dean’s shaft and started to slowly slide his hand up and down. Dean’s head dropped back against the wall, and he panted raggedly. Pleasure built in a steady-fast climb and Dean felt breathless and out of control. But so  _ goddamn  _ good.

Castiel could barely make out Dean’s face in the dark, but  _ fuck  _ he was beautiful when he fell apart. The pretty, breathy, little noises he made as Castiel tightened his grip and sped up his movements sent bursts of arousal pooling low in Castiel’s gut. His cock throbbed in his jeans, and he rutted against Dean's thigh just to get a little friction.

“You’re so fucking hot like this, Dean.” Castiel growled as he ducked his head to press hot, wet kisses to the side of Dean’s neck.

Dean bit his lip hard to keep in the moans that tried to claw their way out of his throat when Castiel sucked a dark mark just under his ear. Tried so hard to be quiet but hot little whimpers and groans spilled from his lips anyway. There was something downright criminal about Castiel marking him up like that. Like Castiel was claiming him, or something, and it made a primal need flare up in Dean.

“Fuck, Cas. I wish, ah-ah,  _ fuck _ , I wish you could fuck me. I wish we had-  _ oh god!  _ I wish we had- had time.” Dean managed to grind out between harsh pants as Castiel’s hand pumped his cock in a steady rhythm, sent pleasure pulsing through him with his mouth and his hand.

“Yeah? I would _love_ that, Dean.” Castiel murmured against his ear, his warm breath sent shivers down Dean’s spine. “I’d open you nice and slow with my fingers, fuck you with them until you begged me to fill you up, until your cock was hard, and leaking and you fell the fuck apart for me. Would you _beg_ for me Dean? If I did that, I think you would. I think you’d look so _fucking_ _good_ , all spread out and wrecked and needy.”

“Cas!” Dean moaned as his hips involuntarily bucked into Castiel’s hand. “Please, Cas, ah,  _ please.” _

Dean was close, so  _ damn  _ close. Castiel’s voice pushed him hard and fast, and he wanted  _ so badly  _ to come. He just  _ needed  _ a little more.

“That’s it Dean, just like that. Fucking  _ love  _ hearing you beg for me. I can’t wait to hear the pretty sounds you make when you come. Are you close?” Castiel asked heatedly, hand never stopping.

Castiel liked it when he begged, huh? Dean could do that for him. Giving Castiel that power over him felt heady and carnal and hot as hell.

“So… so close, Cas. Fuck.” Dean confessed as he barely held himself together enough to answer. “Please. Cas, please let me come.”

Castiel groaned as he sucked Dean’s earlobe into his mouth, and the wet sound combined with Castiel’s teeth scraping against it drove Dean even closer to the edge. Harder, faster, Castiel jacked Dean, his breath hot and damp in his ear.

“Yeah. Come for me.” Castiel said low and Dean tensed as everything crested, his hips stuttered with a few shallow thrusts forward into the circle of Castiel’s fist.

“Cas!” Dean cried out as he came; white hot stripes of come splashed over Castiel’s hand and onto Dean’s shirt.

Soft little panting sobs of pleasure tumbled out of Dean's mouth as Castiel worked him through his climax until he slowed and finally stopped his strokes.

“Fuck that was hot!” Dean breathed as he floated in his afterglow.

Just as Castiel brought his hand, covered in Dean’s come to his mouth and licked at it, Dean opened his eyes. His spent cock twitched at the sight, and he groaned. That right there; that was one of the single sexiest things he’d ever witnessed, and then Castiel reached two fingers out to slide along Dean’s lips, coated them with his come. Dean parted his lips and sucked Castiel’s fingers into his mouth, the salty, bitter taste mildly unpleasant. Dean had never really enjoyed the taste of his own come, but Castiel moaned as he sucked and swirled his tongue around his fingers, and  _ that _ , that was fucking priceless.

Heat curled in Castiel’s gut as Dean took his time licking his fingers clean. Made sure to suck every last drop up before Castiel slipped his fingers out. So fucking hot like that. Dean's eyes were half-closed and Castiel could just make out the satisfaction in them.

Dean tugged against where his wrists were pinned, and Castiel released his arms. Gently, Castiel pulled Dean’s boxer-briefs and pants back up, tucked his cock inside before he buttoned then zipped his jeans and fastened his belt.

The fact that Castiel took care of him like that melted Dean just a little more, and he crushed their lips together as his chest warmed sticky-sweet. Castiel licked the come from Dean’s lips, moaned at the taste and Dean fucking loved it.

Reaching between them, Dean made quick work of pulling down Castiel’s pants and underwear so that he could get his hand on the cock he’d been fantasizing about for so, so  long. Dean just wished he could see it in the dark; it was hard, and wet with pre-come, and Dean just  _ knew  _ it would be flush with arousal and fucking gorgeous.

Castiel’s hands fisted in the back of Dean’s shirt as he held onto him like he needed Dean as close as possible, like he couldn’t breathe without him.

“Cas, you have no- no freaking- idea how many times I’ve pictured this, wanted it.” Dean told him as he stroked Castiel’s dick, built up a rhythm.

“Dean.” Castiel grunted as Dean slid his thumb over the head of Castiel’s cock, teased at the slit. Bliss throbbed hot in Castiel’s body. “I’m not- I won’t last long.”

Dean grinned and sealed their mouths together in a dirty, heated, fucking sinful kiss. He sucked Castiel’s plush lower lip into his mouth and bit down just hard enough to send a jolt of pain through Castiel, made him gasp and buck his hips. And  _ Christ  _ if that wasn’t hot as fuck.

Dean’s hand sped up, his grip tight as he trailed kisses along Castiel’s jaw and then sucked wet and hot down his neck, ran his tongue over Castiel’s pulse point and nipped gently at it.

“Dean, ah!  _ Dean  _ !” Castiel rasped as everything tightened and focused down to Dean’s lips and tongue and teeth and hand, and everything else just faded away.

Heat coiled tight in Castiel’s gut, pooled violently there as pleasure rushed through his veins with every movement Dean made. He bit his lip as Dean sucked hard just under his ear, and then Castiel fractured, dissolved in pleasure so intense he couldn't breathe.

Dean smirked against Castiel’s skin as he came hard and messy in his hand, and splattered them both with come. Castiel gasped for air while he slowly came down from his fucking  _ amazing  _ climax. His eyes opened and he just barely saw that Dean was licking his own fingers clean again.

Jesus, Castiel wasn’t sure if it was hotter watching Dean clean _ his own  _ come off of Castiel’s fingers, or  _ Castiel’s _ come off of  _ his _ fingers and he gave Dean a lopsided self-satisfied smile. Good thing he didn’t have to choose.

“Fuck, you’re hot.” Castiel told him as he swayed forward and caught Dean in a slow, sweet kiss that warmed them both in the cool night air.

As he pulled his underwear and pants back up, Castiel just let himself enjoy the lazy feeling of Dean’s lips pliable and soft against his. Their tongues brushed together, this time without the urgency, and they both luxuriated in it.

Eventually the kisses slowed to a stop. Somehow they ended up sitting on the ground with Dean’s flannel shirt spread out on the dry dirt beneath them. Dean’s arm wrapped around Castiel’s waist, and Castiel leaned up against him, his head rested back on Dean’s shoulder while they stared up at the uninterrupted night sky.

There was no light pollution this far out in the desert, and the sky stretched on forever, lit up with billions of tiny sparks that glittered in the pitch-black sky.

It was breath-taking and awe-inspiring but Dean still thought it couldn’t hold a candle to the perfect blue of Castiel’s eyes. And maybe that made him a sap, but so what, Dean always had loved chick flicks.

Finally, Castiel was the one to break the silence when he tilted his head back to peer up at Dean.

“I love you too, you know.” Castiel confessed quietly, and affection spread through Dean’s chest.

“I know, Cas.” Dean told him just as softly, warmth like melted butter spread through Castiel and he pressed an easy kiss to Dean’s jaw before he looked back up at the stars.

Silence descended on them again, comfortable and warm. Dean tried to wrap himself up in the feeling of Castiel tucked against him, use it to fight off the anxiety and worry that were eating him up as the minutes ticked by.

He couldn’t help that his mind started to catalogue the what-ifs, and so he drew Castiel closer and held him tighter. The idea of losing Castiel  _ hurt  _ and Dean selfishly wanted to keep him here; safe and out of harm’s way, but it wasn’t his decision to make.

Castiel relaxed further into Dean’s arms and let his eyes drift closed. Wanted this moment to burn into his soul like a brand on it that would keep him warm through whatever happened in California. They were headed into a seriously fucked up situation and Castiel wasn’t an idiot, he knew that something awful might happen.

He hoped with everything he had that it wouldn’t, that this time tomorrow they’d all be safe and out of California, but they might not, and that was  _ fucking terrifying  _ because already he needed Dean so much,  _ wanted  _ Dean so much.

They stayed wrapped up together for as long as they could; until headlights cut through the dark, and they were forced to stand up and head back to the Impala.


	10. Chapter 10

9:00pm, Nevada

Dean and Castiel found their way back to the Impala by the light of Dean’s cellphone flashlight. Jo and Michael were already there too and Benny had climbed out of the car to stand with them. Dean watched as his dad’s truck and Bobby’s old Camaro pulled up alongside them. John pulled to a stop and hopped out of the truck.

The disapproval on John’s face was clear even from where Dean stood, and his frown only deepened as he walked over to them. Thankful it was dark enough out that John probably wouldn’t be able to see the dried come on his clothes, Dean made it a point to remember to grab himself and Castiel a clean shirt before they headed out.

“Dean, what the hell’s going on?” John barked by way of greeting.

“Uh, nothing? We waited for you like you said, sir.” Dean replied even though he knew that wasn’t what John meant.

“Like I said, huh?” John retorted with a glare. “Funny, I don’t remember telling you to drag a bunch of other kids with you.”

Dean wasn’t surprised at all by John’s reaction, but he didn’t know what to say, should’ve prepared for this but didn’t and now he floundered awkwardly for an explanation John would accept.

“Well, um, Cas’ brother is at his cottage with Sam, and Cas wanted to come. And you know Jo. Michael’s Jo’s boyfriend and, uh,” Dean said haltingly. “And Benny…”

“Dean, you should know better than this. No, you do know better than this.” John said, tone disappointed, and Dean suddenly felt about five again. “You can’t go bringing a bunch of unqualified kids in on something like this. This isn’t a road trip Dean, for Christ’s sake, there are life or death stakes here.”

“I know. I know that.” Dean said quietly.

“Do they?” John asked scathingly.

“Of course I told them!” Dean exclaimed, and that seemed to mollify John a little.

They stared angrily at one another for a few breaths before Dean looked down, and John sighed loudly.

“Fine. They’re your responsibility Dean. Don’t let anything happen to them.” John finished, frustrated.

“I won’t.” Dean insisted, because what else could he say?

John was right, if he was going to drag them into this, he needed to make sure they made it out. It wasn’t enough just to warn them and try to keep them safe; he needed to actually  _ do  _ it.

“Alright.” John acquiesced gruffly. “Here’s what we’re gonna do: We’re gonna top up the gas in all the cars, then I’m gonna take point, you’ll follow me, and Bobby and Ellen’ll bring up the rear. We don’t stop for anything until we get to Sam. Just in case we’re gonna load up with weapons, keep them accessible. I got ahold of an old buddy of mine in California this morning. He said that headshots are the only thing taking these things out, so make your bullets count if we run into trouble.”

“Yes, sir.” Dean said to confirm his understanding.

“Any of you kids familiar with guns?” John asked as he turned his attention to Dean’s friends. “Not you, Jo, I know already.”

“I am.” Castiel said and Dean’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“Me too.” Benny added.

“Sorta.” Michael offered. “I mean, like I’ve shot a hunting rifle before. And a shotgun loaded with rock-salt. If those count.”

“It’ll do I suppose. Jo, you should probably stick with him. Keep him out of trouble?” John suggested.

“Already plannin’ on it.” Jo agreed with a grin.

“Okay, let’s gear up. Dean take your friends over to the truck and let ‘em pick out some guns. I’m guessin’ you got your Colt on you, but maybe grab a couple others just in case. And make sure you grab a bunch of ammo too. Who knows how many of those things we might come across. Better to be overstocked than under.” John ordered, and Dean quickly complied.


	11. Chapter 11

9:30pm, Nevada

It hadn’t taken them long to get their shit together, and gear up to go. Each of them had a gun at their side, and Dean had two more tucked into the glove box just in case he needed them.

The road was eerily deserted as they drove, Dean followed John’s taillights from a safe distance, and wondered at how odd it was that the steady flow of opposing traffic seemed to be suddenly gone. Then again, he supposed he hadn’t seen another car since they hit Coaldale.

The silence in the car was tense and oppressive and the rock music quietly playing did nothing to soften the tension. Dean looked over at Castiel beside him and the gun in his lap reminded Dean that Castiel knew how to use it.

“Hey, since when do you know how to shoot?” Dean asked him with a raised brow.

It was weird for Dean to think after four years of knowing him, that there were still parts of Castiel and his life that Dean had no idea about. That he had so much left to learn about him.

“Since I was probably eight or so.” Castiel told him with a shrug. “I told you my family was conservative? They’re the kind of conservatives who are obsessed with two things God and guns. Most of my life there were plenty of guns around, and we learned how to shoot early.”

“Well, that’s kind of horrific.” Dean said, at a loss as he tried to imagine someone as awesome as Castiel coming from an environment like that.

“Says the guy who’s got a trunk full of weapons, and whose Dad just handed out guns like candy.” Castiel quipped and Dean chuckled.

“Got me there.” Dean agreed; Castiel smiled at him affectionately.

They fell quiet again as they neared the border. Within a half hour they passed into California, and Dean could tell you the exact spot it went from being Nevada to California, not because of the signs, but because a chill passed over them. A sense of foreboding that was so strong it left an icy feeling in his bones and he had to grit his teeth against it.

“Jesus.” Jo muttered, the only one who mentioned what they all felt, and Michael squeezed her hand tighter in his.

They hadn’t driven much farther when they came to a sign for Benton Hot Springs, and Dean could see a roadblock in the lights of his dad’s car.

“Shit.” Dean swore under his breath as John’s brake lights lit up and he rolled to a stop.

Dean followed suit and tensed with his hand on his gun as he waited to see what would happen. A group of men melted out of the trees, all of them armed with what looked like rifles and shotguns. Dean watched as one of the men approached his dad’s truck, and his attention was so focused on that, that when a knock came at his window he almost jumped out of his skin, heart pounding with a spike of adrenaline.

Dean cautiously rolled down his window, and the guy outside the door leaned down to speak with him. He looked totally normal, just a nondescript white guy, average height and looks, but something about him set Dean’s teeth on edge.

“Sorry, road’s closed.” The guy said with a dead-eyed stare.

“Yeah, I can, uh, see that. What’s up?” Dean questioned as he kept one eye on the situation up at John’s truck.

“Quarantine.” The guy answered simply.

“Quarantine? What is it?” Dean asked, head tilted, eyes narrowed.

“Dunno. Something’s goin’ around out there.”

“Huh. Who told you that?” Dean interrogated.

“County Sheriff.”

“Oh yeah? He here?” Dean asked

“No. She called it in.” The guy said. “Son, why don’t you get out of the car and we can talk a little.”

“Well, you are a handsome devil, but I’m already taken, sorry.” Dean joked with a forced chuckle.

“I’d sure appreciate it if you got out of the car. Just for a quick minute.”

“Yeah, I  _ bet  _ you  _ would.  _ ” Dean remarked under his breath as he adjusted his grip on his Colt.

A breath later, he saw a flash of gunfire and the guy at John’s window flew back and hit the ground. Dean only had a second to react, but it was enough and he fired point blank at the guy standing in his window, didn’t even blink as he made a clean headshot and the guy’s neck snapped back with a sickening crack.

Suddenly shots were being fired in every direction, and the doors of the car were wrenched open.

“Try and stay in the car! I’ll take them out.” Dean called to his friends as he threw himself out the door, and started lining up his gun before he squeezed off shots.

He tried to focus on keeping people away from the car, and he managed to gank the four that were currently trying to get into it without much trouble.

The next thing he knew, Castiel stood back to back with him, firing perfect shots off behind him. Castiel’s aim was every bit as impeccable as Dean’s, but the surge of people from the woods seemed to be never-ending and Dean didn’t know how long they’d be able to keep it up. Adrenaline rushed through his body and he struggled to keep his breathing calm and his hands steady.

Benny had climbed out of the car too and he shot his way back toward Bobby and Ellen, who were being overwhelmed. Dean sent him a silent thank you as he noticed.

Castiel didn’t know how he was managing to do this but he was, he wouldn’t have considered himself brave before this moment, but back to back with Dean? Fighting off monsters? That seemed sort of brave. If it weren’t so fucking terrifying. He fell back on the training his father had put him through, practically raised to be a soldier; just like his brothers and sisters, he knew how to shoot, and he was  _ good  _ at it. Normally he  _ hated  _ that he was good at it, but right then, he was thankful for the first time because just maybe it meant he could keep Dean safe.

Dean shot his clips, and reloaded with the ones he’d tucked into the waistband of his jeans as fast as he could. His attention was ripped away from the car, just for a second as he saw one of the things sneaking up on his mom, and he turned to take it out.

Dean fired, and caught it right between the eyes, but he didn’t even have a minute to be proud of his shot before an ear piercing scream rang out from his car and Dean looked back to see that Michael had been dragged out of the car, and Jo was struggling with one of the infected; it had a hold of her ankle and was pulling her out of the car as she scrabbled for her gun on the floorboard. Dean had a split second to choose, and he went instinctively for Jo.

Wrenched open the door behind her and the thing looked up at Dean just as he squeezed the trigger and blew it’s brains out the other side of the car. It’s grip loosened and it fell back. Jo scrambled to grab her gun and then she slid out of the car; her ears rang from the loud sound of Dean’s shot, but she forced herself to keep going.

“Michael!” She called out, fear and desperation in her voice as she scanned the area for him. She finally spotted him in between the Impala and John’s truck. “Dean! He’s over there!”

Dean glanced over to where Jo had pointed; Michael was on the ground a heavy-set man straddling him with a knife. He dragged the edge of the blade over Michael’s arm and Dean winced when blood welled up red from the deep cut.

“No!” Jo screamed as she raised her gun and fired blindly at the guy.

Dean only hesitated for a second before he lined up the shot himself, and squeezed off a round. Blood trickled and spurted from the wounds in the thing’s body before it fell off of Michael, and Dean couldn’t tell from this distance if any had hit the open wound on Michael’s arm. His stomach churned at the thought while Jo ran toward Michael.

Everything seemed suddenly quiet, and Dean looked up to see the aftermath of the battle. There was no more gunfire echoing in the dark, and he sucked in a sharp breath as he realized it was over. He spun back to look for Castiel, and found him leaned up against the Impala. Dean’s heart stopped for a moment as their eyes locked. Fear spiraled through him; was Castiel hurt?

Castiel shook his head at him, almost like he read Dean’s thoughts, and Dean let out a sigh of relief before guilt crashed hard into him when he remembered Michael. Quickly, Dean turned back and found Jo and Ellen crouched beside him. Ellen was binding the cut in Michael’s forearm with the flannel shirt she’d been wearing, a look of concern on her face as Jo held Michael’s other hand and tears streamed steadily down her face.

“Dean.” John called as he approached, his face a mask of carefully controlled anger.

Dean looked up and saw his parents walking over to him, his mother worried, his dad pissed and Dean felt the weight of the situation crash down on him. Michael might die and it was his fault. He should have never let them come, should have worked harder to keep them safe. And it was too damn late for sorry. _ Fuck _ .

Bobby, Benny and Castiel joined them. John glanced over his shoulder at Jo and Ellen as they tended to Michael, a short unguarded sadness passed over John's face before it hardened again when he looked back at them.

“We have a pretty big fuckin’ problem here.” John said. “There’s no way to know if that boy’s infected or not.”

“He might not be.” Dean interjected, he could tell from the look on John’s face exactly where this conversation was headed.

“Yeah, and he might be Dean. We can’t risk him attacking anyone else. We oughta put him down before he can do any harm.” John argued, voice emotionless.

“John, he’s just a kid, we can’t! Not unless we know for sure.” Mary argued, and Dean thought she looked like an angel; all righteous indignation and concern.

“Mary, do you really wanna take the chance he might turn into one of those and kill someone else?” John questioned gruffly. “Look, I’m not tryin’ to be the bad guy here, I’m just tellin’ you that he’s a huge risk now.”

Tension like angry storm clouds crackled between them as Mary and John stared each other down, and Dean anxiously shifted on his feet.

“Michael’s a good guy.” Dean interrupted quietly. “He deserves a chance.”

“Kid’s right.” Bobby agreed. “We can’t just go ‘round killin’ every  _ maybe  _ monster we come across.”

“Bobby, I got a bad feelin’ about this.” John grumbled as he fixed his best friend with a glare.

And then Jo was there, before any of them registered her approach, she stood before John, head bent, cheeks streaked with tears. She sucked in a breath to calm herself before she looked up at John with her sad eyes.

“Please.” Jo asked simply, voice quivering with emotions she tried to control. “He might be fine. Don’t do this. Please- please, don’t take him from me.”

John rubbed the back of his neck, and then finally nodded. Never could say no to Jo. Relief flooded her, and Jo's shoulders sagged a little as she launched herself forward to wrap her arms around John and bury her face in  his chest while relieved sobs broke free.

Strong and reassuring, John enfolded her in his arms and rubbed her back with one hand as he gently cradled her head with his other; quietly shushed her until she calmed. Dean knew his dad had a soft spot for Jo, she was basically a third Winchester kid what with how much she’d been around growing up, but it was still odd to see his normally gruff dad be so soft and gentle.

A lump formed in Dean’s throat, and he just wished Michael would be okay. Jo needed him to be. Dean had never seen her fall apart like this. Even when her dad had died, Jo hadn’t cried in front of them. Not once, not a single tear. She didn’t like people to see her cry, and to see it now? Broke Dean’s heart for her, and self-condemnation, hot and heavy, made a home for itself in his chest; ached there.

When Jo finally pulled back and wiped off her face, she sighed and glared at all of them.

“We’re never talking about this again. Any of you mention the time I cried, and I swear to  _ God _ , you’ll regret it.” Jo said, and this time her voice was even. “Okay. So we, um, we should probably tie Michael up, just in case, you know? We’ll put him between Benny and I so I can keep an eye on him.”


	12. Chapter 12

Sunday 2:00am, California

Michael looked over at Jo, and she locked eyes with him. Her face was streaked with salty tear tracks, and her eyes were puffy and red but she still looked every bit as beautiful as she always did. Michael wanted to reassure that he was fine, tell her nothing was wrong, but truth is he didn’t know.

He’d been so focused on the pain in his arm that he hadn’t noticed if or where the blood from the infected guy had splattered on him. For all he knew he was infected now too. He felt a little nauseous and cold; was that because of the blood loss or was he infected?

Michael’s stomach squeezed into a hard knot; if he was infected he could hurt Jo. Or Benny, Dean, Cas, any of them. He didn’t want that to happen and fear gripped him tightly. He especially couldn’t hurt Jo, he wouldn’t. Shouldn’t even be given the chance to hurt one damn hair on her perfect head.

And if he was infected he could. No; he would. He couldn’t let himself do that. He loved Jo too much to put her in that position. It wasn’t fair to risk her life like this.

“Jo, I know you don’t wanna hear this, sweetheart; but you should shoot me. I’m probably infected-”

“You don’t know that, Michael!” Jo objected, panic in her voice, eyes stinging even though she had no tears left to cry.

“Jo, baby, I don’t wanna take the chance I might hurt you.” Michael replied softly as he tried to soothe her.

“No.” Jo said angrily.

“Joanna…” Michael tried.

“No, Michael. We’re not talking about this.” Jo said as she crossed her arms and turned to stare out the window.

Michael sighed, and let his chin drop to his chest. There was no arguing with Jo when she got like that. She had a stubborn streak the size of Canada. He closed his eyes and tried to focus on his body, to figure out if it was changing without his permission, but he just didn’t know and that drove him fucking crazy. How could he protect Jo from something that might be inside of him?

\---

They pulled through Columbia, California; A small town that had cashed in on it’s gold-rush old-timey feel, but now the streets were deserted. Which honestly wouldn’t be unusual for this time of night, but it felt unnatural nonetheless.

The car had been silent since Michael and Jo had argued and Dean choked on it, on the guilt and pain he’d caused by letting them come. Michael hadn’t said a word for a long time now, and it made Dean nervous, like maybe if he was talking, they could tell if he turned.

With a fatigued sigh, Dean turned his attention back to driving as he tightened his grip on the steering wheel. He could feel Castiel’s eyes on him, but he couldn’t look at him right now, couldn’t handle the concern he knew flooded those baby blue’s.

Michael looked up and smiled sweetly at Jo, and she smiled back at him, glad to see him in better spirits. She reached out a hand and squeezed his thigh comfortingly.

Shock flashed through Jo when the ropes binding Michael snapped the second he flexed. Jo gasped as he grabbed her and shoved his hand in her pocket, pulled out her pocket knife with a grin.

“Can always count on you to have a knife on ya, Jo!” Michael exclaimed cheerfully with a deranged grin as he pressed a kiss to her temple.

“Fuck!” Dean swore as he slammed on the brakes.

Jo struggled in Michael’s grasp as he flicked the knife open. In a quick attempt to stop him, Benny grabbed for Michael’s arm as the tires squealed and the car swerved.

Michael’s elbow slammed back into Benny’s face and the force of it crashed Benny’s head into the window; knocked him out cold.

Agony bright and searing pierced Jo's shoulder and she cried out as Michael stabbed the knife deep before he yanked it out. Just as Michael ripped the bloodied shirt off of the gash in his arm and pressed it to the wound in Jo’s shoulder, Dean spun in his seat and raised his gun.

The moment hung taut in the air, almost slow motion and silent as Dean squeezed down on the trigger and put a bullet in Michael’s head. Dean blinked as everything seemed to come sharply back into focus; Michael stared up at the ceiling with dead, glassy eyes, blood trickled between them from the bullet hole.

Sucking in a gasp as sound returned, the sound of Jo screaming for Michael seared itself into Dean’s brain. Jo’s eyes flashed to Dean, filled with horror before she let out a guttural sob and yanked her door open, fled from the car and ran toward her mother.

_ No, no, no, no, no. This can’t be happening. Not Jo, too. No! Holy shit, I-I-I just killed him. I didn’t even fucking hesitate. I just, I fucking blew him away! But Jo… I-I had to save Jo. No, I was too late to save Jo. Son of a bitch! _

Dean snapped out of his circling thoughts when Castiel’s hand closed over his shoulder, and the tears Dean was trying so damn hard to hold back rolled over his cheeks while he stared at Michael’s body in the backseat. This was Dean’s fault, Michael was a good friend, a good  _ person  _ and he was gone because of Dean. Anguish twisted in his gut as he shifted his attention to Benny, unconscious in the back, slumped against the door.

“Benny?” Dean asked, and Castiel turned to lean over the seat and check on him.

“I think he’s okay, but I’m not a doctor or anything.” Castiel said as he slid back down beside Dean.

“We need to get Michael out of the car.” Dean stated woodenly and Castiel nodded his agreement.

Dean wrenched his door open and slid out. Jo was wrapped in Ellen’s arms, Bobby standing uselessly to the side, looking shell shocked in the headlights, something bloody and raw tore open in Dean's chest. He avoided looking over at his parents as he opened the back door, reached in and carefully pulled Michael from the car.

Somehow he ended up holding under Michael’s arms while Castiel had a hand on each leg. Jo’s cries echoed loudly behind them, sent unpleasant shivers down their spines as Dean and Castiel carried him into the woods.

Castiel’s gut clenched and sorrow filled him; Michael had been his roommate, one of his best friends, and Castiel was carrying his dead body into the woods. There was something wrong, so absolutely wrong about that. Nauseous and shaky, he forced himself to be calm for Dean.

Once they’d gotten far enough from the cars they gently laid Michael down on a soft patch of moss. Dean stared down at Michael and he looked so young and fragile and  _ broken  _ on the ground in the dark.

“We don’t even have time to bury him. He deserves a fucking grave, Cas.” Dean choked out as flapped his hand at Michael.

“I know.” Castiel agreed and he closed the distance between them, pulled Dean to him and Dean let himself be drawn into a hug.

Suffocating regret and culpability blocked Dean’s throat and made his eyes sting with fresh tears as he buried his face in Castiel’s neck. Clung to him desperately like maybe Castiel could save him from his own thoughts, his own condemnation, the truth.

“It’s not your fault Dean.” Castiel insisted, his arms tightened around Dean to hold him there, tried to make Dean believe those words even though he knew he wouldn’t.

“It’s exactly my fault, Cas! I got Michael killed- did worse. I-I shot him myself.” Dean’s voice broke as his heart squeezed painfully but he pushed the rest out. “And now Jo’s gonna die too, and that’s... that’s on me.”

“You can’t save everyone, Dean.” Castiel said; his hand moved up to card gently through Dean’s hair.

“Startin’ to feel like I can’t save anyone, Cas. I should’ve, I dunno, been stronger or faster. Fuck. Should’ve done this on my own... Never should’ve brought any of you.” Dean protested and he felt the weight of his own words settle on his shoulders like lead weights that weighed him down.

Castiel tugged Dean’s head back and crashed his lips to Dean’s in a kiss that was pleading and sweet and desperate all at once and Dean’s heart broke all over again at the emotion in it. He didn’t deserve this, didn’t deserve to have Castiel like this.

Castiel needed Dean to see how much he meant to him, how much he needed him because he thought Dean deserved  _ everything _ .  _ Was  _ everything.

“I love you.” Castiel told Dean honestly when he broke the kiss. “I’ll always go with you. Always.”

Dean rested his forehead against Castiel’s and stared into his eyes up close, throat thick with a million conflicting feelings; and just one crystal clear thought in his mind.

“It scares me how goddamn much I  _ need  _ you.” Dean confessed in a whisper Castiel barely heard.

\---

John didn’t have to say a word for Dean to understand just how pissed his dad was. And of course he was upset. Jo was good as dead, because of Dean. The thought rattled around in his head, and he felt hollow with grief, wished he couldn’t feel a damn thing because this  _ hurt  _ so goddamn  _ bad _ .

He couldn’t imagine life without Jo; they’d been best friends since before Dean even had solid memories. Through thick and thin, hell and high water, come what may, all that shit; Jo had always been there for him, she’d been a constant in his life that he’d been grateful for.

And now he had to figure out how to say goodbye to her, how to apologize to her, and fuck, he knew he didn’t deserve it, but he knew without a damn doubt she’d forgive him because  _ that  _ was Jo. And it wasn’t fucking fair, it just wasn’t.

John didn’t even bother to come over and lecture him, and that just made Dean feel worse, like his own dad couldn’t stand the sight of him anymore. He just shook his head, and got back in his truck.

When Mary said something to John, and then cast a sad glance back at him, Dean swallowed down the lump in his throat, she looked like she wanted to comfort him before she sent him a watery smile then climbed into the truck too.

Dean’s heart sank as he turned back to his car. At least Castiel had managed to wake Benny up when they’d gotten back to the car, and a blanket was spread in the backseat covering the bloodstains. Dean knew they were there, though, as if a blanket could make him forget that.

Even though you couldn’t see it from the road, Dean’s eyes scanned the woods, looked for the place they’d left Michael. He felt an almost overwhelming urge to take the blanket from the backseat and wrap Michael up in it to keep him warm. Dean knew it was irrational, dumb even, Michael didn’t- couldn’t care anymore, but he still wanted to do it.

Dean let out a breath full of exhaustion and grief as he tugged open his door and slumped into his seat.


	13. Chapter 13

2:40am, California

They drove down Parrot’s Ferry road and they crossed over a bridge. Dean didn’t think about the directions, just followed John on auto-pilot as his thoughts churned melancholy. The drive took them straight for a while and then John turned right at a sign for Murphy’s.

Dean didn’t tune back into his surroundings until he noticed a crowd of people who stood and blocked the road at the turn off for Pennsylvania Gulch road.  

Lucky for them, there weren’t cars obstructing the way this time, and John didn’t bother stopping, he just laid on the horn and ploughed right through them. Dean grimaced at the sight; bodies flew through the air like ragdolls as John’s truck rammed through.

Dean pressed harder on the gas, didn’t hesitate a bit, and he saw in his rear-view that Bobby did the same. Dean thought he probably should have felt some sort of guilt for the people his dad had run down, that he’d probably hit too, but he couldn’t find it in him.

His capacity for guilt and regret were all tied up in Jo and what was happening to her. A quick check to the rear-view again showed a few of the people chasing after them, and they were fast, but not  _ that  _ fast. It wasn’t long before they faded into the distance.

They pulled up to the gate around Gabriel’s cottage a couple of rights and a left later. A tendril of relief curled through Dean, but his fears for Jo quickly smothered it.

“You call this a cottage, Cas? This is practically a mansion.” Benny rumbled from the back with a lopsided grin that looked all wrong.

“Well, Gabe calls it his cottage. I’d say it’s more average house sized.” Castiel said with a small smile before he got out of the car.

He jogged up to the security panel and buzzed Gabriel. Then the gates groaned as they opened, and Castiel climbed back into the car.

Once Bobby had pulled through behind them, the heavy gate slid closed while they followed the long driveway up toward the house.

Gabriel was waiting next to a four car garage, and he waved them in. They took turns backing the cars in, and then Gabriel shut the garage door with the flick of a switch.

\---

Jo was pale as John carried her up the stairs into Gabriel’s living room. Gabriel ran off to find his first aid kit, and Ellen reached down to hold Jo’s hand after John laid her gently onto the couch. Ellen’s eyes were watery, and she felt like breaking down but she didn’t cry, she needed to be strong for her baby. Jo needed her, and Ellen was strong enough for both of them.

Gabriel dashed back into the room with the kit, and Ellen patched Jo’s shoulder up as best she could. Helplessly, Dean watched from the corner of the room, while Sam stared with wide eyes between everyone. Dean couldn’t even bring himself to comfort Sam, he was too busy watching Jo’s face crumple in pain.

“It’s okay, baby. I’m right here. You’re gonna be okay.” Ellen said reassuringly when she finally taped a wad of gauze over the stitched up wound.

“Mom.” Jo warned softly, face drawn and drenched in sweat. “Don’t give me that crap. Michael- Michael infected me. I’m not gonna be okay.”

“Jo, honey, it’s okay. We’ll figure something out baby.” Ellen told her, voice steady as she smoothed Jo’s hair.

“Mom.” Jo whimpered as tears filled her eyes and Ellen hugged her gently before she laid her back on the couch.

Gabriel brought over a spare blanket and Ellen spread it over Jo. It wasn’t much but there wasn’t a whole lot they could do for her, and Ellen’s heart ached with grief.

“Just rest sweetheart. I need to talk to John and Mary for a minute, alright? Just for a minute. Dean? Can you sit with Jo? Just make sure she’s alright for me?” Ellen asked, and Dean instantly stepped forward and sank down on the floor next to Jo’s head.

He swallowed down the tears that wanted to fall when Ellen softly patted his head and thanked him before Gabriel showed them to the spare room for some privacy.

Sam was still staring at them with big sorrowful eyes, and his lips were parted, like he couldn’t understand what he was seeing, but Dean couldn’t right now, so he looked back over at Jo.

Bobby clapped a hand down on Sam’s shoulder then led him and Benny away into the kitchen, and Dean was grateful for the thousandth time to him.

Slowly, breath held tight in his chest, Dean looked into Jo’s eyes. He didn’t feel like he even deserved to be in the same space as Jo right then, she was everything pure and good in the world and he was the guy who got her killed. His heart was heavy; full of misery and remorse, and all he could do was look at Jo like he wished he could take it all back.

“Dean Winchester, stop looking at me like you ran over my dog.” Jo told him and as she reached out to cup his cheek a tear ran over it. Jo brushed it away with her thumb. “This wasn’t your fault, so stop. I’m the one who couldn’t let Michael go. I’m the one who didn’t listen when he begged me to kill him before this happened. This isn’t on you, Dean.”

Dean’s body was too hot, and his mouth was thick with despair and grief, so many words crowded his mind and none of the ones he wanted to say would come out.

“I’m sorry, Jo. I’m so fucking sorry.” Dean croaked miserably.

“Dean, you can’t blame yourself.” Jo begged, and tears spilled over her cheeks too as she implored him. “I don’t blame you. You  _ have  _ to know that. I  _ love  _ you, and I don’t want you to carry the weight of this. It’s  _ not  _ fair, but it’s  _ not  _ your fault either. Just- Just take care of Sam, Cas and Benny. Make sure they make it out of here, alright? And make sure mom’s okay, because-” Jo swallowed hard. “Because she’s gonna need you.”

Dean just nodded because if he opened his mouth to speak, he wasn’t sure he could hold back the sobs that threatened to wrack his body.

\---

“I’m staying with Jo.” Ellen told John and Mary; her voice rang with stubbornness. “Once she turns, I’ll… I’ll put her down, and then myself.”

John’s brows shot up and he shook his head as Mary launched herself forward to grab Ellen’s shoulders.

“Ellen, you can’t. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.” Mary tried to reason. “You know Jo wouldn’t want this for you.”

Ellen understood their reaction, she did, but it didn’t change her mind a bit. Without Jo she had nothing. Didn’t want to have anything. She couldn’t go back to her life without her, there’d be no good in the world. No sense. It was wrong, Ellen thought, so damn wrong that a parent would ever outlive their child. She couldn’t face that.

“Good thing I’m the parent, then, isn’t it?” Ellen said with a bitter smile. “Jo’s all I got, Mary. I’m not gonna leave my baby to die alone, and I sure as hell ain’t gonna put a bullet in her while she’s still herself.”

“Ellen…” Mary tried, as tears welled up in her eyes.

“What would you do Mary? If you lost John, and it was Sam and Dean?” Ellen asked quietly.

Mary’s head drooped a little as she admitted she’d do the same and Ellen let herself be pulled into a hug.

\---

Ellen came back just as Jo nodded off to sleep and she placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder. Dean looked up and Ellen smiled down gently at him.

“I’ll take over.” She said softly and Dean slipped his hand out of Jo’s as he blinked back tears.

Ellen should be angry at him, not kind, he was the one who got Jo into this mess, no matter what Jo said. Everyone being so understanding just made it all hurt even more, but then, maybe he deserved that.

Dean tried to smile back at her, but he wasn’t sure what his face ended up looking like as he stood up. Ellen knelt down in his spot, and Dean wandered off to find Castiel. He’d lost track of him somewhere in the panic of taking care of Jo, and now he itched with the need to reassure himself that Castiel was okay.

A quick scan of the kitchen as he avoided everyone’s eyes while he checked for Castiel showed him that he wasn’t there, so Dean headed further down the hall. Faint voices were talking behind the door at the end of the hall, and Dean knocked gently.

The voices inside went silent just before Castiel opened the door, and he smiled soft as air at Dean.

“Hi.” Dean said.

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel replied warmly, which for some reason made the ache in Dean’s chest spread and his face fall.

Castiel’s brow furrowed with concern and Dean had to look down to get control of himself before he started sobbing like a baby right there in the hall.

“Hey, why don’t I give you guys a few minutes.” Gabriel spoke up from further in the room. “I should probably go be a good host and make my guests some food anyway.”

“Thanks, Gabe.” Castiel said and Dean moved out of the way to let Gabriel pass.

Castiel dragged Dean into the room and shut the door behind them. As soon as the door closed, Dean reached for Castiel and collapsed into his arms. Castiel held him tight, his heart hurt for Dean and Jo and Michael and he was barely able to keep himself together, but he needed to.

Dean’s shoulders shook with the sobs he’d held back and he clung to Castiel as he finally lost it. Tears soaked into Castiel’s shirt while Dean gasped for air and tried to smother the sound of his crying in the side of Castiel’s neck. He was  _ breaking apart  _ in Castiel’s arms, and Castiel didn’t know how to help, so he smoothed his hands over Dean’s back and held him close, whispered soft words to him. Half the time Castiel didn’t even know what he said, just that he needed to keep Dean there, grounded.

“It’s okay, Dean, it’s okay.” Castiel murmured softly into Dean’s hair. “Love you, love you so much.”

Over and over he said it until Dean finally pulled back and wiped his face on the sleeve of his flannel shirt.  _ God,  _ he probably looked fucking disgusting, but Castiel was looking at him with nothing but love and concern and  _ warmth  _ and Dean wanted to bask in the feeling of Castiel  _ loving  _ him, live there forever.

“God, I love you.” Dean breathed as he looked deeply into Castiel’s eyes just before Castiel slotted their mouths together in a kiss that shook Dean to his core.

All of the love and desperation and faith that Castiel felt for Dean, he channeled into the kiss. Tried to show Dean with his lips and tongue and teeth that he  _ needed  _ him,  _ loved  _ him,  _ wanted  _ him.

Dean swallowed it all down, had to feel Castiel against him, assure himself that Castiel was still safe, Castiel still wanted him, Castiel didn’t blame him, even though he couldn’t quite accept that last one.

Castiel’s hands wound up in Dean’s hair, and Dean frantically grasped the back of Castiel’s shirt, tugged him impossibly closer. He  _ needed  _ to feel Castiel, was frenzied in his urgency.

Taking control of the kiss, Castiel slowed it, used it to calm Dean and soothe him, made it sweeter and some small sense of peace flooded Dean’s chest as his heart rate slowed. He relaxed into it until Castiel pressed their lips together in soft, easy little brushes.

Dean let himself smile into the kisses, even if it felt wrong to be smiling right then. He couldn’t help the swell of emotion he felt when he opened his eyes and saw that perfect blue shining back at him. Castiel always knew exactly how to read Dean, and how to help him without Dean saying a word, and that was  _ fucking  _ amazing.

An incessant beeping noise blared out from the kitchen and Castiel pulled away from Dean reluctantly.  The two of them rushed to see what was going on.

“It’s the alarm for the gate!” Gabriel exclaimed as he pushed a button on the small tv mounted to the wall. The screen lit up with an image of the front gate. There must’ve been dozens and dozens of people out there, because as the screen flicked through various camera angles, each one was full of people. “Fuck.”

The people, likely the infected people they’d passed earlier, must’ve finally realized someone was inside here, and they all watched the screen in horror as they tried to get in.

“We’re so fucked!” Sam exclaimed as he looked around, hazel eyes huge with fear.


	14. Chapter 14

3:30am, California

“Everybody calm the hell down!” John shouted over the chorus of panicked voices that all vied for attention.

At the sound of John’s voice they all fell silent and stared.

“Here’s what we’re gonna do: Sam and Dean; the two of you are gonna look around this cottage and cobble together whatever you can to make the biggest bomb you can. This ain’t your first rodeo, you know what you’re doing, so focus and get it done. Once they’ve rigged that, we’ll get to the cars, lure the infected into the house to clear the biggest path down the drive that we can, and then we’ll blow it all to hell as we take off. Take out as many of those sons a bitches as we can on our way out.” John said calmly.

“That’s… that’s insane.” Gabriel replied weakly before he glared and his voice got stronger. “What the hell kind of plan is that?”

“You got a better one?” John asked with a raised brow and when Gabriel didn’t respond John smirked. “Didn’t think so. Boys? Get a move on.”

“Yes, sir.” They answered and headed off to rig up what they could.

“ _ Jesus.  _ I’m glad this is just my cottage. All my good stuff’s home in Kansas.” Gabriel said to no one in particular. “Hey, you think insurance’ll cover this?”

Castiel rolled his eyes at him.

\---

Dean and Sam rigged up a bomb as fast as they could, and then Dean popped back into the kitchen where everyone was still glued to the security monitor with sick fascination.

“Hey, you got something we could use as a timer?” Dean asked Gabriel.

“You don’t need one.” Ellen cut in from the door to the living room. “We can’t risk taking Jo. Her time’s nearly up.”

When Dean tried to protest, Ellen just dropped a hand onto his shoulder and squeezed gently.

“No, it is. Jo and I will hold ‘em off. Give you all a fair shot at gettin’ outta here. Someone’s gotta open the door and let ‘em in.” Ellen told them roughly.

Tears stung Dean’s eyes again, and he looked around the room to see everyone else’s eyes were watering too. John’s hit Dean the hardest because he’d  _ never  _ seen his Dad cry, and there was something  _ wrong  _ about it that just  _ hurt _ .

Sam’s face was wet and tears poured from his eyes while he shook his head. Ellen made a soft noise and moved to wrap him up in a tight hug. Sam buried his face in her neck, his arms enveloped her tightly as sobs wracked his body.

“Shhh. Sam, it’s okay, sweetheart.” Ellen consoled him quietly, strongly. “Don’t you feel guilty about this. Jo and I love you like family, and we  _ chose  _ this. There’s worse ways for a hunter to go Sam, you know that.”

As Ellen ran her fingers through Sam’s hair and rocked him gently for a moment, Dean slipped out of the kitchen. He had to see Jo.

Jo was still laid out on the couch, but her eyes were open now, and her smile as Dean walked up was warm like hot chocolate in the middle of winter and Dean just wanted to etch it in his mind, wanted to remember every little detail about Jo; her eyes and hair and smile and voice. The way she put on a brave face no matter what, the way she took care of him when he should be the one taking care of her. His heart twisted, and he felt like nothing would ever be right again.

Dean leaned down and pressed a long kiss to her forehead, like if he just paused there, if he just kept his lips on her soft skin, they could stay there, frozen in a place where Jo was okay.

Eventually he had to pull away though and the intense sorrow that washed over him as his lips left her skin crushed him beneath its weight. Dean dropped to his knees beside Jo, and looked up at her as the ache in his chest grew and grew until he thought it would consume him.

“I’m so sorry Jo.” Dean said through his tears, and Jo shook her head faintly as she cupped his cheeks and smiled at him.

“Hey, no.” Jo told him. “Don’t. I’ll be okay Dean. I’m tough. I’ll- I’ll watch over you, okay? I promise.”

Dean laughed through his tears because that was just so  _ Jo.  _ Taking care of him again.

“I love you, kid.” Dean said, and his voice caught on the words, but he needed to say them before it was too late, Jo was the little sister he never knew he wanted until he had her and this was  _ so hard _ .

“Love you too, Dean.” Jo admitted with a watery smile as her easy-going façade cracked a little and Dean swallowed hard at the sight of tears in her eyes.

Jo was trying so hard to hold it together for him, and it  _ wasn’t fucking fair _ . He should be the one being strong for Jo, but he couldn’t stop the tears that dripped from his eyes, not when he knew he wouldn’t see her again. Wouldn’t tease her or laugh with her, wouldn’t watch her get married and have beautiful little shining babies like she was meant to and it was  _ painful  _ to let her go.

“Hey, can you get Cas? I wanna talk to him for a minute.” Jo requested, tone deceivingly cheerfully.

“Yeah.” Dean choked, and he ran his hand over Jo’s cheek one last time before he stood up and went to get Castiel.

\---

Castiel leaned down to hug Jo tightly, his heart felt heavy and full of grief as held onto her, but he didn’t let himself cry, even if he wanted to. Jo needed him to be strong, and Dean needed it even more. If he let himself shed a single tear, he’d never be able to stop crying.

“You take care of Dean, okay?” Jo said, with her cheek pressed against his. “Don’t let him drown in guilt. Don’t let this be the thing that kills him. He deserves to be happy, and so do you. Don’t let him push you away if he tries. You know how he gets.”

“I’ll take care of him.” Castiel promised and his throat stung with the tears he held back, because of course some of Jo’s last words would be concern for others.

Castiel had liked Jo from the moment he’d met her, she was crazy and feisty and had such a big personality for such a small girl, and this wasn’t the way things were supposed to go for Jo. It felt  _ wrong  _ and  _ awful  _ and he didn’t want to let go, didn’t want to say goodbye.

“You gotta go, Cas.” She told him sadly and Castiel nodded, released an unsteady breath as he stood back up.

\---

After everyone had said their goodbyes, Ellen just smiled at them all with a grin that was designed to let them know it was okay. But it wasn't, never would be.

“I’ll give it five minutes before I set it off, that oughta be enough time for you to get in the cars and get far enough away.” Ellen told them. “Now get outta here.”

Bobby’s eyes lingered on her a moment longer, and her smile softened a little. She nodded her head toward the stairs and Bobby’s shoulders slumped before he gave her a sad attempt at a half-smile.

There wasn’t a dry eye among them as Dean took Castiel’s hand and followed his parents and Bobby down into the garage. Benny was behind them and Sam and Gabriel made up the rear. Sam cast one last sorrowful look over his shoulder at the women who were giving up their lives for him. More tears flooded his eyes as Gabriel laced their fingers together and tugged him toward the stairs.

“It’s okay, sweetheart.” Ellen told him just before he lost sight of her, and Sam gasped back a sob.

\---

“I’ll go with Gabe, and Cas can go with Dean.” Sam announced, voice choked with emotion as he threw his focus into what was going to happen when they got to the bottom of the stairs.

Dean looked back at Sam, torn; a lifetime of conditioning told him that he needed Sam in his car, needed to make sure he was safe, but he couldn’t fathom letting go of Castiel’s hand right then, didn’t know if he could let Castiel out of his sight.

Just like Castiel always did, he picked up on Dean’s hesitation and squeezed his hand, offered him a smile before he tried to pull his hand out of Dean’s grip.

“Why don’t I go with Gabe, and Sam, you can go with Dean?”  Castiel offered, and Dean’s brows jumped up in surprise.

“I think that’s-” John began, but Dean cut him off before he finished.

“No. Cas stays with me.” Dean objected, and he squeezed Castiel’s hand tighter.

John’s eyes narrowed and Dean could tell his dad wanted to argue, but Mary put a hand on his arm.

“John, it’s fine.” Mary told him in a tone that allowed no argument and John grunted before he got into his truck.

Mary climbed in after him, and the others all followed suit into their vehicles; Dean, Castiel and Benny in the Impala, Gabriel and Sam in Gabe’s little red sports car, and Bobby in his beat up old Camaro.

Ellen yelled down the stairs a moment later to let them know she’d opened the gate and the door.

The sound of her voice brought a fresh wave of tears to many of their faces, and Dean bit his lip hard to get himself to focus. John waited a minute to start his truck, and then the rest of them did the same.

John signaled for Gabe to use the remote garage door opener and the second the doors were up, John slammed on the gas, Dean followed, then Gabe, and lastly Bobby. They sped down the driveway and a few people tried to reach out and grab their cars or stood in their path, but none of them slowed.

They’d barely made it through the front gate when the explosion rang out behind them and fire erupted in a huge ball from the cottage. Dean’s heart felt like it would stop any second now, because how was he supposed to live with this?

All he wanted was to go back in time to when Ellen and Jo and Michael were safe, and keep them that way. Life didn’t work like that though, there were no do overs, and there was no way to fix the pit inside of him filled with anguish and pain and thoughts that tortured him as they drove and tears rolled down his face.

\---

The road to the California border had been completely deserted, no roadblocks, or anything to slow them down. And as they passed through Coaldale the radio crackled back to life.

“... _ mysteriously lost contact with the entire state of California. Authorities suspect bioterrorism but so far no group has stepped forward to claim responsibility for the attack.” _

By the time they pulled through Tonopah the radio announced that a second wave of National Guard and CDC officials had entered California an hour ago, and so far, they’d found nothing, no remains, no traces of the disease. Everyone was just gone. The only remnants were the destruction to property and the word Croatoan carved and painted in various locations.

Dean shut off the radio after that. He was tired, and numb, and he didn’t want to hear it.  

\---

When they made it back to Lawrence, Dean was driving again after Castiel had taken a shift, and he followed his dad’s truck on auto-pilot all the way back to the house he’d grown up in. He didn’t even question it when he tiredly led Benny, Castiel, Sam and Gabe inside to collapse at the kitchen table.

Like something out of an afterschool special Mary started pulling out ingredients to make breakfast, and Dean knew it was her way of coping so he kept his mouth shut instead of telling her to rest like he wanted to.

John and Bobby went out to the garage, and left them to awkwardly sit at the kitchen table while Mary rushed around whipping up pancake batter from scratch, and mixing omelets until she shooed them outside to the backyard. She said all the eyes on her were getting creepy. And it all felt too normal, so Dean went along with it and took Castiel out to lay under the big maple out back.

Benny, Sam and Gabriel stretched out beside them moments later, and they all stared up at the bright blue Kansas sky.

“So, what are we supposed to do now?” Sam wondered in a voice too small for him.

“I dunno.” Dean shrugged, and he didn’t because what the fuck  _ were  _ they supposed to do?

How could they go back to their normal lives after all that? Dean couldn’t even think about going back to school without Jo and Michael. Just the thought of going back for his stuff made him want to throw up.

“If you wanna go back to university Sam, I have some connections at the University of Kansas. I could help you get in for next semester.” Gabriel offered, and Sam’s eyes lit up just a little.

“Yeah?” Sam asked. “That might be good.”

“And you know, if you, uh, need a place to stay for a while and you don’t um, wanna live with your parents… I’ve got a spare room if you want it.” Gabriel stuttered, and Dean raised an eyebrow when Sam blushed because  _ what the actual fuck? _

“Really? That sounds great.” Sam said enthusiastically, and Dean turned to find Cas just as shocked as he was.

What the hell kind of twilight zone bullshit was going on with their brothers?

“What about you Dean?” Sam asked, interrupting Dean’s train of slightly horrified thought.

“I’m not going back to school. Whatever that was back there, it was big. That was some end of the world type shit. And I can’t pretend it’s not happening. Hunting’s in my blood, and they’re gonna need hunters to help with whatever this turns out to be.” Dean told them.

“Then I’ll go with you.” Castiel told him simply, and Dean looked into those blue eyes that stared at him so intently, so  _ warmly _ .

He couldn’t do it; he couldn’t drag Castiel into this too. Castiel deserved to be happy and safe and to never have to worry about whether or not one or both of them were going to die any given day. His chest ached, but he couldn’t do that to Castiel.

“What happened to Michael, Ellen, Jo? That’s what happens to hunters, Cas. I can’t let that happen to you. You deserve better than that; better than me. You’re fucking perfect and I’m,  _ fuck _ , Cas. I’m cursed. Everything I touch falls apart.”

“Cursed or not, Dean, I’d rather have you.” Castiel said, frustrated. “And you think I can just go back to school? To the room I shared with Michael? Pretend like this never happened,  _ we  _ never happened?  _ No _ . Whatever path you choose, wherever you lead; I’m coming with you. End of discussion.”

“Cas…” Dean said, he begged Castiel to reconsider with his eyes, and watched as the stubbornness in Castiel’s eyes reflected back at him.

“Dean.” Castiel replied sternly, and Dean realized he wasn’t going to win this argument so he sighed, and leaned over to press a quick kiss to Castiel’s lips, because  _ fuck  _ Castiel’s voice when he’d given his little speech had warmed Dean right through to his soul.

“Me too, brother.” Benny piped up. “I figure we can’t just sit around lookin’ pretty, hopin’ someone else’s gonna clean up this mess. I’m in too.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been meaning to break this up into chapters ever since I wrote it. Finally got around to it tonight, so sorry if you just got a zillion notifications from me. <3<3

6 months later

“We need to get back to the motel  _ right now.  _ ” Dean hissed at Castiel and Castiel just smirked at him.

Dean would never,  _ never  _ get over how hot it was to watch Castiel take down a supernatural son of a bitch. Like,  _ ridiculously  _ hot. Castiel was a fucking badass. Between Dean and Benny, they’d trained Castiel up in record time, and now he was probably a better hunter than either of them. Which had shocked the fuck out of all of them to be honest.  

But  _ goddamn _ , it was so hot that nine times out of ten, they finished up a hunt by heading back to their motel where Benny would book the farthest room possible from them because Dean needed to get Castiel’s hands on him, and Dean was anything but quiet when Castiel fucked him.

The drive back to the hotel was basically an illegal form of torture as far as Dean was concerned, but words like  _ public indecency  _ and  _ sex offender registry  _ tended to mean Dean had to keep it in his pants until later.

Dean let out a long suffering sigh as he drove, and despite the fact that Castiel tried to hide another smirk by looking out his window, Dean saw it and glared at him.

Finally, blessedly they arrived at the hotel, and the well-practiced dance that was their usual post-hunt routine kicked in.

“I’ll see ya tomorrow.” Benny said as he climbed out of the back of the Impala and Dean grunted out a goodbye.

“See ya, Benny!” Castiel called after him cheerfully and Dean counted to ten in his head.

Castiel turned back to Dean, and his eyes were dark and hot and Dean’s heart rate jumped. Reflexively, Dean swallowed hard as Castiel slid across the bench seat until he could grab the back of Dean’s hair and pull him in for a possessive, dirty kiss that flickered arousal through both of them.

Dean groaned into Castiel’s mouth; he fucking loved it when Castiel got all dominant like this, and tingles of anticipation trickled down Dean’s back when Castiel pulled his hair just a little harder. Expertly, Castiel took Dean apart with nothing more than his mouth on Dean’s and a hand in his hair, and in no time flat Dean was desperate for more.

Just when he thought he couldn’t take it any longer, Castiel pulled back and fixed him with a hungry stare that burned desire into Dean’s skin.

“In the room.  _ Now.  _ ” Castiel ordered, voice low and hot and so commanding that Dean scrambled to comply.

In a flash Dean got out of the car and jogged to their door, stopped long enough to quickly unlock it and then he was inside. Dean closed the door behind himself and stripped instantly down to nothing, sat on the bed and waited for Castiel; Just the way he knew Castiel wanted him. Drawing out the anticipation, Castiel was taking his time on purpose,  and Dean didn’t really get why it turned him on so much, but it fucking  _ did _ .

The longer Dean waited the faster his breaths came, his cock was fully hard long before Castiel casually sauntered into the room. The door shut and the the sound of the deadbolt as it snapped into place sent a shudder through Dean.

And then Castiel turned around to face him, those blue eyes that Dean  _ loved  _ focused on him with an intensity that never failed to make him hazy and nearly reeling with want. Dean licked his lips and Castiel’s eyes followed the trail as he crossed the room and crawled onto the bed over Dean.

In a practiced, synchonized movement, Dean’s legs parted to make room for Castiel, let his upper body fall back onto the matress. Bliss burst along his nerve endings at the drag of Castiel’s clothing over his bare skin. Slowly, Castiel leaned down until they were a fraction of an inch apart, until Dean could feel Castiel’s breath over the sensitive flesh of his parted lips.

“I could feel you watching me today you know.” Castiel told him, and the rough sound of his voice scraped over Dean’s skin, sent a jolt of heat straight to his throbbing dick. “Do you have any idea how distracting you are? When you watch me like that?”

Dean knew, but he kept his mouth shut like he was supposed to, waited like he was supposed to.

“Were you thinking of this, Dean? When you were watching me?” Castiel asked as his hand snaked between them to palm Dean’s hard cock.

“Fuck,  _ yes _ .” Dean hissed as he arched into the touch and Castiel smirked down at him.

Castiel’s fingers curled around Dean’s cock and Dean rolled his hips up into the friction. Pleasure spiked through him, and he  _ needed  _ more, wanted Castiel inside him, right fucking now. He held out though, kept the words that wanted to leak out and beg locked inside for now.

Finally Castiel closed the gap between their lips and plunged his tongue into Dean’s mouth, hot and wet and fucking demanding, swirled it around Dean’s before Dean sucked on it. Hot as hell, Castiel took charge of the kiss and used his tongue to fuck Dean’s mouth, kept his hand steady for Dean to fuck up into.

Everything felt fucking  _ awesome _ , and Dean had to focus hard so he didn’t blow his load right then, because he was wound tight and Castiel was hitting all the right notes to make Dean ache for it.

Dean gasped hot into Castiel’s mouth when he tightened his grip for just a minute and then pulled away completely. Dean’s brain scrambled to keep up as Castiel leaned over him and reached into the nightstand. It was hard to concentrate beyond the pleasure pulsing in his veins.

“Condom or no?” Castiel asked roughly, and Dean shivered.

“Wanna feel you come inside me.” Dean chose, and Castiel nodded as lust, carnal and heady flared in him at Dean’s words.

Castiel withdrew his hand from the drawer with just the tube of Astroglide that Dean had stashed there yesterday. He stared at Dean; hunger burned blue-black in his eyes and Dean’s body flamed like dry kindling under his gaze.

“Hmm.” Castiel mused as he leaned back up onto his knees to get a better look at Dean spread out in front of him, hard and needy, cock already flushed dark, leaking sticky pre-come.

Dean fought the whine that tried to escape his throat as Castiel trailed a finger lightly over the length of his cock, dragged it over the tip, then down the other side. Another wet pearl beaded at the head of his cock and Castiel smirked.

“Roll over.” Castiel said and Dean readily obeyed.

A hum of satisfaction rumbled in Castiel's chest when Dean leaned down to rest his chin on his forearms, kept his ass in the air, ready for him. Dean looked so fucking hot like that, and Castiel’s cock strained for attention. With more than a little difficulty, Castiel ignored it in favor of uncapping the lube.

Dean sucked in a tight breath at the click, and excitement bubbled up in his chest because soon,  _ so soon,  _ Castiel would be sliding into him, and he couldn’t fucking wait.

The wet squelch of the lube as Castiel squirted it onto his hand just heightened Dean’s impatience and made him squirm in a sinfully sweet display that made Castiel groan softly.

And then Castiel was draped over his back so he could press hot kisses to the nape of Dean’s neck as his fingers smoothly circled the puckered rim of Dean’s hole. Pleasure spiked in little sparks at the sensation, and then then Castiel slipped a finger inside of him and Dean couldn’t help the moan that tore from his throat.

“God you’re so fucking hot, Dean.” Castiel murmured against his skin and Dean groaned at the wrecked sound of Castiel’s voice as his finger thrust slowly into him, spread the lube inside him. "So tight."

It felt so good, so goddamn good, but it wasn't enough, never enough. He needed Cas to hurry up and fuck him. Foreplay was great and all, but Dean just wanted to be fucked, hard, fast.  _ Now. _

“ _ Fuck _ , Cas.” Dean panted. “Please.”

“Please, what? Tell me what you want.” Castiel demanded and Dean gasped for air as Castiel’s finger stopped moving completely.

_ No, no, no. _

“More, please, more,  _ Cas  _ . I-I need, I need  _ more _ .” Dean begged just the way he knew Castiel loved.

“Good, Dean.” Castiel sighed, and the praise lit Dean up in a way that he never would have anticipated before they’d started doing this.

Castiel slipped another slick finger into him, and the slight sting of the initial penetration was quickly lost to pleasure as Castiel found his prostate and rubbed his fingers firmly over it. Dean bucked his hips back, wordlessly begged him not to stop. His hips rolled back with every press of Castiel's fingers and Dean's mind quickly shut down, unaware of anything other than the pleasure Castiel was wringing from his body.

“Christ, you’re beautiful like this.” Castiel said hotly against his skin, and Dean melted and caught fire at the same time.

Castiel’s fingers thrust and scissored, stretched him slowly open, pushed more lube into him until he was dripping with it and felt so damn good that Dean made hot little noises with every move. Before long Castiel had three fingers inside him, Dean was covered in a fine sheen of sweat and he panted and rocked his ass back hard onto the fingers that were fucking into him. Still,  _ still _ wasn't enough.

Fucking finally, Castiel pulled his hand away and Dean suppressed the whine that tried to burst from his chest. Castiel’s zipper as he slid it down echoed in the room and Dean bit his lip hard at the rustle when Castiel pulled his pants down, but not off. Dean fucking loved it when he was fully naked and Castiel was clothed, the power imbalance was thrilling and hot and made everything feel a million times more dirty. There was another wet sucking noise as Castiel got more lube and generously slicked his cock.

And then- and then, Castiel’s cock pressed bluntly against Dean’s hole, not hard enough to slip inside, but hard enough to let Dean know it was there, and Dean  _ did  _ whine then.

“ _ Cas  _ \- Castiel, please, please. Just fuck me. I need you to fuck me, please. Please Castiel.” Dean begged as Castiel gripped his hip tightly with one steady hand.

“Mmm. I fucking love it when you beg like that. Tell me how  _ badly  _ you want me to fuck you, Dean. Maybe then I’ll give it to you.” Castiel taunted and the words went right to Dean’s cock as it pulsed and dripped pre-come onto the sheet beneath him.

“So  _ bad _ , Cas. Want you- I want you to fuck me so bad. God, I  _ need  _ you- need you to  _ fuck _ me. Please, Cas.” Dean panted, voice rough with  _ need  _ and  _ want  _ and Castiel couldn’t resist anymore.

So he pushed forward, felt Dean's body resist, resist and then give. His cock slid smoothly all the way into Dean, until he was buried as far as he could go and Dean was  _ hot  _ and  _ tight  _ and  _ fucking  _ silky perfect around him.

“Please, Cas, Baby, fuck me, please.  _ Fuck me  _ .” Dean pleaded, so far beyond caring how desperate he sounded and Castiel obliged him; pulled his hips back and slammed hard into him, over and over.

And  _ Christ _ , the sounds Dean made then drove Castiel crazy, harsh grunts and panting whines that were barely more than breathy gasps as Castiel sank inside him again and again. At the same time, Castiel sucked dark kisses all along Dean's shoulders and the back of his neck, scraped his teeth along his sensitive skin.

Harder, faster and it felt goddamn fantastic, Dean loved every second; stretched and split open on Castiel's cock as he slickly fucked into him. Couldn't get better, couldn't get closer. It wasn't just the mind-blowing sex either, though it was mind-blowing. It was the feelings and emotions too, when Cas tenderly wiped Dean's sweaty bangs off his forehead, held an arm across Dean's chest for leverage while he stroked his other hand reverently over any part of Dean he could reach. Love and lust coiled so tightly together that it was hard to tell one from the other as they bounced around Dean's body like a pinball machine, setting off all sorts of sensations his brain just barely processed.

Castiel slid an arm under Dean and pulled him back so that Dean’s back was pressed to his chest and they were kneeling. Dean reached behind himself to grab Castiel’s hips for balance and Castiel wrapped one arm around Dean’s waist to hold him tight and pull him roughly down, guide the pace as Dean bounced in his lap and Castiel thrust ruthlessly up into him.

The change in angle brushed Castiel’s cock perfectly over Dean’s prostate and pleasure blazed hot through Dean at each pass. Scintillating sparks of bliss flared in Dean, heated up his already over-warm body. His face was flushed dark, almost red, his mouth slack, head dropped back onto Castiel's shoulder and god it was hot, Castiel thought, getting to watch him like that.

Dean's ass was tight and lube-slick and felt goddamn amazing, better than anyone else Castiel had ever been with, hotter or silkier, something undefinably Dean, and Castiel felt so fucking good with each thrust, that familiar heat in his gut pooled, rose in steady-hot waves. Just feeling Dean's skin under his hands was enough to edge him a little closer to that precipice he was so close to reaching.

Castiel's free hand cupped Dean's chin, twisted his head to the side for a messy, uncontrolled kiss that was barely more than open mouths panting into each other and tongues twining wetly. Castiel's hand slid down around Dean's throat and Dean sucked in a breath, his eyes went wide, completely clouded with desire. Castiel put just enough pressure on his throat to feel a little dangerous without cutting off his air.

Dean's cock jumped, leaked a steady, thick stream of pre-come and Dean couldn't take it anymore, he needed- needed to come right the fuck then, he was so close. Needed it.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Dean chanted, he was so close and then Castiel reached his other hand down to stroke Dean’s cock, and Dean was lost in sensation, his head fell back to rest on Castiel’s shoulder again. “Please, please,  _ please.” _

“Fuck. Come. Dean, c'mon, come for me.” Castiel whispered hot in his ear and then he bit down hard and wet on the muscle in the curve where Dean’s neck met his shoulder, and Dean burst.

“ _ Castiel!  _ ” Dean shouted out as his blood rushed in his ears and come spurted hot over Castiel’s hand and up Dean’s chest while pleasure wracked his body like electric jolts of euphoria.  

“Fuck, Dean.” Castiel moaned into his neck as he pushed Dean back down onto the bed, and Dean barely had the brainpower to lock his thighs and keep his ass in the air.

Castiel gripped his hips and fucked Dean hard through his afterglow. The nearly overwhelming feeling of Castiel’s cock pounding into him, the wet slap of skin on skin as Castiel used his body to chase his release, Dean loved it all.

God, Dean was almost unbearably tight and hot around Castiel, still clenching with the aftershocks of his orgasm and every thrust was like a little slice of his own personal fucking  _ heaven _ . Just perfect and so goddamn  _ right _ .

Dean hardly heard the sounds coming from his own mouth, but they pushed Castiel harder and harder until he tensed and his rhythm faltered as he came hot, and wet and filthy in Dean’s ass. Dean groaned at the feeling, loved the way it filled him up and Castiel shook over him as his cock emptied into him.  

Just for a minute, Castiel stayed there, the only sounds in the room the harsh panting of their breaths, and Dean felt sated and warm and  _ awesome _ . Then Castiel pressed a soft kiss to Dean’s neck as he slid his cock out of him. Dean groaned as he let himself collapse onto the dirty sheets.

Exhausted, Castiel flopped down beside him and tilted his head to meet Dean in a lazy kiss that felt caring and easy in a way that they both adored.

They stayed like that for a long time, just traded soft kisses and quiet words until Dean couldn’t stand lying in the wet spot anymore, and the feeling of come as it dripped from his ass went from hot to gross.

“C’mon, let’s go take a shower.” Castiel suggested, and Dean went willingly.

The hot spray of the shower was rapture, and Castiel rubbed shampoo into Dean’s hair. His nails lightly scratched Dean’s scalp as he worked the lather in, and Dean basked in the attention. Letting Castiel take care of him like that was sometimes hard for Dean, especially after a difficult case, but he always soaked it up when he allowed himself to. Castiel tilted Dean’s head back into the spray to rinse away the suds, and Dean sighed soft, and sweet.

“I love you so much.” Castiel said as affection for Dean swelled warm in his chest, and Dean blinked water out of his eyes to see Castiel watching him with one of those sunshine smiles he could never get enough of.

“I love you too, Cas.” Dean said before he kissed Castiel long and deep and full of so much love that it almost made his chest ache with it.

When Castiel pulled back to grab the body wash, they both grinned at each other.

\---

Like most nights, Dean and Castiel ended up tangled together on a motel bed, content and wrapped up in one another. Dean wouldn’t have said he was a cuddler, and he wasn’t, unless it was Castiel, and then he was like a cat in sunlight; pleasantly toasty and perfectly content.

Castiel was stretched out on his back, and Dean rested his head on Castiel’s chest, just listened to his heartbeat in the dark of the room; steady and reassuring. Castiel laced their fingers together and pulled Dean’s hand up to kiss his knuckles before he settled Dean’s arm across his waist.

There was no better place to be than wrapped up in Castiel’s arms, loved. Even with the world going to shit around them some days, Dean wouldn’t change a thing because every moment with Castiel was worth it. As tired as they were, it didn’t take long for the world around them to start fading away.

"Hey." Castiel said sleepily.

"Yeah?"

"You totally called me Baby."

"What? No I didn't." Dean disagreed, cheeks pinkening up with the lie.

"Did too. Went something like 'Please, Cas, Baby, fuck me'." 

"Hey, a man can't be held responsible for what he says while being fucked." Dean argued reasonably.

"What if I liked it?" Castiel asked slyly.

He looked down as Dean tilted his head up.

"Then I'd say, go to sleep, Baby."

"Mmm. Yeah, I like it. Think Baby'll be jealous?"

"Cas, you do know Baby's a car right, an inanimate object?"

"And?"

"Just go to sleep!"

"Go to sleep...." Castiel prompted.

"Go to sleep please... Baby."

Castiel chuckled and settled down, smiled lazily when Dean pressed a goodnight kiss to his jaw.

A little while later they fell asleep just listening to each other breathe.

\---

A knock on the door startled them awake in the morning. And Dean yawned, buried his head into the crook of Castiel’s neck. Tried to ignore it. Castiel chuckled softly; Dean and mornings still didn’t mix.

“C’mon, open the door!” Benny called grumpily from outside. “Ten hours oughta be enough for you two, I’m bored as fuck out here! Besides, I think I found another case!”

**The End**


End file.
